IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

About the Author

LORRAINE PETERSON was born in Red Wing, Minnesota, grew up on a farm

near Ellsworth, Wisconsin, and now resides in El Paso, Texas. She lived for some

years in Ciudad Juarez, Mexico. She received her B.A. (in history) from North Park

College in Chicago, and has taken summer courses from the University of

Minnesota and the University of Mexico in Mexico City.

Lorraine has taught high school and junior high. She has been an advisor to

nondenominational Christian clubs in Minneapolis public schools, has taught

teenage Bible studies, and continues to work with young people. She has written

several bestselling devotional books for teens:

If God Loves Me, Why Can't I Get My Locker Open?

Falling Off Cloud Nine and Other High Places

Why Isn’t God Giving Cash Prizes?

Real Characters in the Making

Dying of Embarrassment & Living to Tell About It

Anybody Can Be Cool, But Awesome Takes Practice

If the Devil Made You Do It, You Blew It!

Radical Advice From the Ultimate Wise Guy

If You Really Trust Me, Why Can't I Stay Out Later?

How to Get a Life … No Strings Attached!

Please Give Me Another Chance, Lord

Trying to Get Toothpaste Back Into the Tube

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Lord, I Haven’t Talked to You Since the Last Crisis, But …

Preface

When I was twelve years old, our Bible camp speaker challenged us to start having

daily devotions. I accepted that challenge. That decision to spend time with Jesus

each day, in Bible study and prayer, has been one of the most important decisions

I've ever made. That habit has put me in touch with the Source of all comfort and

power throughout my life.

I remember the morning I received news that my mother was dying. I had read

Psalm 112 the day before, and knew where to find the words, “For the righteous will

never be moved… He is not afraid of evil tidings; his heart is firm, trusting in the

Lord.” Many times the verses I've read in my regular “quiet time” contained exactly

the message I needed for that day.

When I began having devotions, I had no specific guidelines to follow. In later

years, whenever I would give one of my high school students a booklet of lessons

for new Christians, all I could advise was, “Now, read a chapter a day in the New

Testament.” Inside, I knew most teens needed a more structured approach to Bible

study, with questions to help them apply Bible truths to daily life. That’s what this

book is for. It is designed to make reading the Bible affect the way you clean your

room and the way you respond when Dad says you can't use the car on Saturday

night. I want you to discover that studying the Bible is exciting and relevant. (In

order to gain the most from these lessons, keep a notebook and write down your

answers.)

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Acknowledgments

This book was made possible because I have received so much from so many who

have faithfully opened up the Bible to me: Mel Johnson and his “Tips for Teens”;

Intervarsity Christian Fellowship, Campus Crusade for Christ, and the Navigators;

Rev. Earnest O’Neill of Campus Church; Leighton Carlson, my Sunday School

teacher; Andrew Murray, author of New Life in Christ; and Watchman Nee, who

wrote The Normal Christian Life. Most of the material found in this book was first

presented to the weekly Bible studies I conducted and it is to these former students

who faithfully attended my Bible studies that I dedicate this book.

Many other people have also had a significant part in the development of this book.

For instance, the members of the Edison High Student Life Club, who often put me

to shame with their zeal and devotion to Christ, and Colleen Watson, a fellow

counselor, who made me decide to spend my summer vacation writing this book.

Finally, there are the people who supported me and helped me: Rev. and Mrs. James

Kaupang who kept me on their prayer list; my father, who taught me that dreams

come true only by hard work; my sister, Lynn and Aunt Harriet, who insisted that I

send my manuscript to a publisher; my nieces and nephews Beth, Brett, Kaari and

Kirk, who in the earliest stages of my writing had great plans for “Aunt Lorraine’s

book”; and my roommates, Ruth, Karen, Vickey, and Kris, who continually helped,

encouraged, and tolerated the mess.

Lorraine Peterson

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

About the Author

Preface

Acknowledgments

CONTENTS

WEEK ONE: THE BIGGEST DECISIONS OF YOUR LIFE

What Are My Choices?

12

Window Shopping or Really Searching?

13

But What if I Find It?

14

Is It a Real Dollar Bill, or a Counterfeit?

15

What Makes You a Christian?

16

Are You Ready to Get into the Wheelbarrow?

17

Will the Real Christian Please Stand Up?

18

WEEK TWO: NO TURNING BACK

Till Death Us Do Part

21

Receiving Jesus

22

But Don’t Look in the Closet

23

Your Gift to God

24

Lord, May I Change My Mind?

26

You Can Be Sure

27

Assurance

28

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

WEEK THREE: THERE IS A DIFFERENCE!

If You Have Jesus, You Have Everything

31

Green Pastures and Still Waters

32

Your Best Friend – Jesus

33

Happiness Is Jesus

34

This Job Takes Jesus

35

Are There Goliaths in Your Life?

37

I Am Weak but He Is Strong

38

WEEK FOUR: HOW TO WIN THE WAR AGAINST SIN

When It’s Legal to Hate

41

Does This Shake You Up a Little?

42

Even If They Stone You

43

But

44

Eve Made Me Do It

45

Do You Enjoy Being Kidnapped?

47

Repent? You’ve Got To Be Kidding!

48

WEEK FIVE: THAT NASTY STUFF CALLED “SIN”

Sin and Separation

51

Hiding in the Garden Is Not Advised

52

The Blood of Jesus

53

So Satan Is Accusing You Again!

54

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

But God Is on My Side

55

How Did I Become a Sinner?

57

Whose Slave Are You?

58

WEEK SIX: FORGIVENESS

Sin Removal

61

Perfectly Clean

62

How Many Times Is Seventy-Times-Seven?

63

Are You Forgiving Yourself?

65

Forgiven Sinners, Inc.

66

No Unfinished Projects

67

God Even Used Peter’s Big Mouth

68

WEEK SEVEN: QUIT SINNING AND START WINNING

Do You Send Invitations to Temptation?

71

Choosing Right

72

Right and Wrong

73

That Selfishness Inside Me

75

Caterpillars Can Change

76

Faith and Sin Can't Sit on the Same Bench

77

But You Could Fly

78

WEEK EIGHT: ME, MYSELF, AND I – YOUR SELF-IMAGE

Who Am I Anyway?

81

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

God Loves You – Pimples and All

82

Self-Image

84

Self- Consciousness

85

Lions, Losers, and Lessons

86

The Right Frame For the Picture

87

You Make a Perfect You

88

WEEK NINE: TAKE A HARD LOOK AT YOURSELF

Who Tells You What to Do?

92

Are You Starring on Broadway or Being Yourself?

93

About That Log in Your Eye

94

You're Not Okay, and Neither Am I

95

Whom Do You Look Like?

97

Walking in the Footsteps of Jesus

98

The Treasure Inside You

99

WEEK TEN: GOD DOES LOVE YOU!

Nobody Loves Me

102

Forever Love

103

But You Can't Hug God!

104

Love Is a Two-Way Street

105

How to Get Enough Water in Your Bucket

106

If God Loves Me, Why Can't I Get My Locker Open?

107

Nothing Else Matters

109

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

WEEK ELEVEN: THE RIGHT KIND OF ROMANCE

Love Is Not That Queezy Feeling in Your Stomach

112

Thirsty Camels and Prince Charming

113

The True Love Exam

114

The Bible Talks About Figs, Not Dates

116

I Don’t Need Any Advice

117

Your Responsibility in Dating

119

I’d Rather Lie Than Hurt His Feelings

120

WEEK TWELVE: IT’S NOT EASY TO LOVE

Broken, Bleeding Hearts and Puppy Love

123

Jesus, the Heart Healer

124

But, Everybody’s Doing It!

125

God Lays It on the Line

126

Are You Running a Reform School?

128

Love Someone You Hate

129

Love Can Melt Enemies

130

WEEK THIRTEEN: THAT MOUTH OF YOURS

Does Your Tongue Need a Prison Sentence?

134

Please Erase the Remark I Just Made

135

Your Mouth Needs a Lie Detector

136

You Mean Complaining Is a Sin?

138

Snakes, Quails, and Grumblers

139

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Did You Know That Your Mind Is on Parade?

141

Oh, What a Beautiful Tongue You Have!

142

HOW TO USE THIS BOOK

To Teenagers for Daily Devotions:

In order to get the most out of these lessons, keep a notebook and write down the

answers. The lazy part of you is saying, “I don’t want to – it’s too much work.”

However, education research supports the idea that you remember things you write

down longer than things you only think about. God's Word is very important –

important enough to get your best effort.

To Youth Workers for Sunday School or Bible Study Material:

Leaders should assign the daily readings for the week. Ask students to write out the

answers to the questions along with any new questions that they would like to

discuss with the group. The leader can pick out the most important questions and ask

members to contribute their findings. If it is not practical for your group to prepare

in advance, it would be better to spend at least two weeks on each topic, read the

material in class, and cover the questions as you go along. The teacher will want to

add questions and thoughts that are specifically relevant to the particular group being

taught.

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

WEEK ONE

THE BIGGEST DECISION

OF YOUR LIFE

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

What Are My Choices?

When you're deciding what to do with your life, the possibilities at first seem

limitless. There are hundreds of occupations to choose from and probably thousands

of people you could marry. You might want to live in sunny California, frigid

Alaska, or maybe even settle in Paris or Rio.

But even when you're happily married, working at your occupation, and living

in your dream home, you will still have to decide what to do with your life. There

are only two real choices – or at the most, three: (1) to live for yourself; (2) to live

for other people – the ones you choose; or (3) to live for God.

When you think of all the mistakes you’ve made so far, and contemplate all the

errors you’ve watched others make, you should have a healthy fear of making your

own decisions and “doing your own thing.” If there is a God who showed himself to

the world through His Son Jesus, and gave us the Bible, there is only ONE logical

choice, and that is to live your life – all of it – for God.

“Choose this day whom ye will serve” (Joshua 24:15).

“And this is eternal life, that they know thee, the only true God, and Jesus

Christ whom thou hast sent” (John 17:3).

“Thus says the Lord: ‘Let not the wise man glory in his wisdom, let not the

mighty man glory in his might, let not the rich man glory in his riches; but let him

who glories glory in this, that he understands and knows me, that I am the Lord

who practice kindness, justice, and righteousness in the earth; for in these things I

delight, says the Lord’” (Jeremiah 9:23, 24).

1. What qualities of God can you find in these verses?

2. Why is knowing God so important?

3. What is the greatest thing you can achieve in your life?

4. Is knowing God the most important goal for your life? What are you doing to

reach that goal?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Window Shopping – Or Really Searching?

A guy named Skip loved animals and had a special interest in a pet monkey

that was for sale in a local pet shop. He went to see the monkey often and enjoyed

playing with it. He even dreamed about the monkey at night. Clerks who saw how

much he liked the monkey kept hoping for a sale, but they always received the

answer, “I don’t make a lot of money. If I bought a monkey I’d have to move; my

neighbors think a monkey is a weird pet. Besides, I enjoy just coming here to see

him because I get the benefit of enjoying him without the responsibility of caring for

him and buying his food.”

Skip was a confirmed window-shopper. He refused to get involved or make a

firm decision. Skip could honestly say, “I went shopping today for a pet monkey, but

I couldn’t find one.

A lot of people are window-shopping for Christianity. They are drawn by

Jesus’ love and the benefits of living for Christ. Because they may go to church and

even read the Bible, they might be saying, “I'm seeking God, but I just can't find

Him.” The truth is, if they didn’t care what their friends thought, if they were willing

to let God change their lives, if they would assume responsibility and if they'd

consider God more important than any possession or friendship, they would find

Him.

“You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart”

(Jeremiah 29:13).

“And as he was setting out on his journey, a man ran up and knelt before him,

and asked him, ‘Good Teacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?’ … And

Jesus looking upon him loved him, and said to him, ‘You lack one thing; go, sell

what you have, and give to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven; and

come, follow me.’ At that saying his countenance fell, and he went away

sorrowful; for he had great possessions” (Mark 10:17, 21, 22).

1. Was the rich man really seeking Jesus, or just window-shopping? Why?

2. Notice that Jesus went straight to the point – to the thing this man wouldn’t give

up to follow Him. What was it?

3. What other things keep people from following Jesus?

4. If you or another person is endlessly searching for God, what is the basic reason

for not finding Him?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

But What If I Find It?

What are you looking for? Be careful. You'll most likely find it! You may say

that you are looking for peace, or happiness, or reality, but you have probably

already decided what will give you this. You may have determined that enough

money will give you peace of mind – you don’t want to worry about finances the

way your parents do. Marrying the right person should make you “live happily ever

after.” Or maybe you think you can find reality if you study all the great thinkers, or

take the right drugs.

If you put all your energies into trying to accumulate money, you will

probably succeed at just that. If you are determined to marry a certain person, you

may reach your goal. You may also become very knowledgeable about philosophy

or psychology. The problem is that all of us know of people who have gotten exactly

what they wanted – only to be miserable.

Enough that God my Father knows,

Nothing this hope can dim;

He gives the very best to those

Who leave the choice with Him.

- Author Unknown

“But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things shall be

yours as well” (Matthew 6:33).

“The kingdom of heaven is like treasure hidden in a field that a man found

and covered up; then in his joy he goes and sells all that he has and buys that

field. Again, the kingdom of heaven is like a merchant in search of fine pearls,

who, on finding one pearl of great value, went and sold all that he had and bought

it” (Matthew 13:44-46).

1. How valuable was the pearl in the story Jesus told?

2. How important to you is finding God, and your place in His kingdom?

3. List the things that are hindrances to your finding God and the plan He has for

you. Be very honest and very specific.

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Is It a Real Dollar Bill, or a Counterfeit?

You’ve heard it and have probably said it yourself: “If that’s Christianity, I

don’t want it.” However, in many cases what the person is rejecting is not

Christianity. It’s Pastor Law’s eighty extra commandments; it’s the stubbornness

displayed by some church people; or it’s Matilda’s hard-hearted attitude toward the

girl desperately needing help. Remember that God decides whom the real Christians

are, and that many people who claim to be Christians really aren’t. However, those

who are real Christians don’t always live their Christianity either.

It has been said that if there weren't any real dollar bills, there wouldn’t be any

counterfeits. Well, there are real Christians and there are counterfeits. Don’t reject

Christianity because there are hypocrites in the church, because the German church

didn’t stand up against Hitler, or because your uncle who reads the Bible all the time

yells at you. If you do reject Christianity, first take time to read the New Testament

for yourself so you know what you are rejecting. Then be honest enough to admit

that you're rejecting Jesus because you're unwilling to make the changes He requires

in your life. Jesus wants to be the Boss of your life; He demands so much that many

people have said of real Christianity, “If that’s Christianity, I don’t want it.”

“Many of his disciples, when they heard it, said, “This is a hard saying; who

can listen to it?’” (John 6:60).

“After this many of his disciples drew back and no longer went about with

him. Jesus said to the twelve, ‘Will you also go away?’ Simon Peter answered

him, ‘Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life; and we

have believed, and have come to know, that you are the Holy One of God’”

(John 6:66-69).

1. Why didn’t Peter want to leave Jesus even if some of His teachings were tough?

2. Why does Jesus have the right to tell the disciples – and us – what to do?

3. Why do you think the other disciples left Jesus? (Reading John 6 could help you

here.)

4. Why do people today decide not to follow Jesus?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

What Makes You a Christian?

Which of these would most certainly be a Christian? (a.) Charlene Church

Attender (b.) Dudley Do-Gooder (c.) Baptized Benjamin (d.) Confirmed Cynthia (e.)

None of the Above

You probably answered the question correctly because you realized that just

doing something outward can't change you on the inside. Yet, a lot of people think

that believing the right things, using the right words, and running with the right

crowd makes one a Christian. There is no magic in the words, “Jesus, come into my

life” if they're simply repeated because someone else thought it was a good idea.

Others think that being “born again” is just turning over a new leaf, a

determination to be better. Your deciding to be different won't save you either. Of

course, you have to believe that Jesus is God's Son who came to die for your sins.

And, after you become a Christian you will want to do good deeds. Yet, the missing

ingredient here is repentance. Repentance means not only feeling sorry for your sin,

but being willing to give it up and to turn around and face God honestly. If you

admit your sin and are willing to let Jesus change you and run your life, then the

words, “Jesus, come into my life” have meaning, and the Spirit of Jesus

miraculously enters you.

An early American evangelist was confronted on the street by a drunk. One of

his critics turned to him and said, “There’s one of your converts.” The evangelist

replied, “He must be one of mine. He certainly isn’t one of God's.” Are you God's

convert or somebody else’s?

“Repent and believe in the Gospel” (Mark 1:15)

“Jesus answered him, ‘Truly, truly I say to you, unless one is born anew, he

cannot see the kingdom of God.’ Nicodemus said to him, ‘How can a man be

born when he is old? Can he enter a second time into his mother’s womb and be

born?’ Jesus answered, ‘Truly, truly I say to you, unless one is born of water and

the Spirit, he cannot enter the kingdom of God. That which is born of the flesh is

flesh, and that which is born of the Spirit is spirit. Do not marvel that is said to

you, “You must be born anew”’” (John 3:3-7).

1. With what does Jesus compare conversion? (Conversion: “accepting Christ,” or

being “saved”).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

2. Can you think of a more drastic change than being born all over again and

becoming a new person?

3. According to John 3:6, can a person be called a Christian if he or she has not

miraculously been changed by God on the inside? Why not?

Are You Ready to Get into the Wheelbarrow?

If I really believe something strongly enough, I will act on it. If I'm convinced

that understanding chemistry will help me get through nurses’ training, I'll study

hard. If I'm certain that I can't make the cheerleading squad, I won't even try out. If I

really believe the ice will hold, I'll go snowmobiling on the frozen lake. Saying, “I

believe the ice will hold, but I’d never walk on it,” would reveal my lack of faith.

If you really believe in Jesus, you'll want to trust Him. There is an old story

about a man who walked on a tightrope across Niagara Falls. Next, he wheeled an

empty wheelbarrow across the rope above Niagara Falls. Then he asked his

applauding crowd, “Do you believe that I can put a man in the wheelbarrow and still

make it across?” Everyone shouted, “Yes!” then he asked, “Who will get into the

wheelbarrow?” No one volunteered.

Real faith will have action. Do you have “getting into the wheelbarrow” faith?

This is the kind of faith needed to receive salvation.

“He who believes in the Son has eternal life; he who does not obey the Son

shall not see life, but the wrath of God rests upon him” (John 3:36).

In the next passage, Paul describes what active faith meant in his life. To get

the whole story, read chapters nine and twenty-six of Acts. (“Repent” means to

turn around and change one’s ways. “Gentiles” refers to people who are not

Jewish).

“Wherefore, O King Agrippa, I was not disobedient to the heavenly vision,

but declared first to those at Damascus, then at Jerusalem and throughout all the

country of Judea, and also the Gentiles, that they should repent and turn to God

and perform deeds worthy of their repentance. For this reason the Jews seized me

in the temple and tried to kill me” (Acts 26:19-21).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

1. What did obeying God cost Paul?

2. Would it have been logical for Paul to have said to Jesus, “I have enough faith to

let you save me, but not enough to do what you ask of me”? Why not”

3. When Paul preached to the people, what things did he tell them to do?

4. Is faith in Jesus real if it does not change one’s life?

Will the Real Christian Please Stand Up?

When someone says, “Jesus is the Lord of my life,” what picture do you

conjure up in your mind – a person demanding things from Skyways Prayer

Answering Service, Inc., an employee who does the King’s work when conditions

are favorable, or a slave who bows before his Master and calls Him “Lord”? Because

we don’t have slaves and absolute rulers anymore, the word “Lord” doesn’t mean

much to us.

Back in Roman times, calling someone Lord meant that he, like Caesar, had

absolute life-and-death power over you, that he had the right to this authority, and

that you would obey him. In that context, can you really say that Jesus is the Lord of

your life?

In our culture, no one wants to obey. A student once remarked to me, “I think

too much of myself to do as you say.”

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

If we are so self-centered that we refuse to obey Jesus, we have no right to call

ourselves Christians. We can think so much of ourselves that we’ll miss heaven.

“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ shall enter the kingdom of

heaven, but he who does the will of my Father who is in heaven” (Matthew

7:21).

“But what does it say? The word is near you, on your lips and in your heart

(that is, the word of faith which we preach); because, if you confess with your

lips that Jesus is Lord and believe in your heart that God raised him from the

dead, you will be saved. For man believes with his heart and so is justified, and

he confesses with his lips and so is saved. The Scripture says, ‘No one who

believes in Him will be put to shame.’ For there is no distinction between Jew

and Greek; the same Lord is Lord of all and bestows His riches upon all who call

upon Him. For everyone who calls upon the name of the Lord shall be saved’”

(Romans 10:8-13).

1. By what actions does a person display faith in the word that is preached?

2. What promise is given in Romans 10:11? Would we need this promise if faith

did not require actions?

3. What do you think confessing “Jesus is Lord” really means?

4. Can you call Jesus “Lord” and mean it?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

WEEK TWO

NO TURNING BACK

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Till Death Us Do Part

If you’ve ever attended a traditional wedding ceremony, you’ve heard things

like, “For better, for worse; for richer, for poorer; in sickness and in health … till

death us do part.” Taken seriously, that’s a tremendous commitment to live up to.

Would you describe your relationship with Jesus Christ as that kind of commitment,

or do you think of it as “Try Jesus for ninety days; there’s nothing to lose, and

there’s a money-back guarantee”?

Have you given yourself to Him because He is truth, because He made you,

and because He who is smarter than anyone else has the right to run your life? Or do

you just think it might be a good deal for you?

Do you think Jesus is pretty fortunate that you noticed Him, or do you realize

that you in no way deserve His mercy and grace? The Apostle Paul referred to

himself as a “slave of Jesus Christ.” Do you think of Him as the Great Genie-in-the-

Sky who should consider your every wish as His command?

There are facts you base your life on – an operation will cure appendicitis, it’s

safer to slow down when driving around mountain curves, and jumping from a

twelfth-story window is hazardous to your health. Whether or not you feel like

acting in accordance with these facts, they are valid. They are true whether or not

you understand the reasons behind them, and whether or not everyone else believes

in them.

You must commit yourself to Jesus because of the facts – “He is the way, the

truth, and the life” – and not because He’ll give you a new high. Following Jesus and

His truth has great end results, but it takes a lifetime commitment.

“And he who does not take his cross and follow me is not worthy of me”

(Matthew 10:38).

“For which of you, desiring to build a tower, does not first sit down and count

the cost, whether he has enough to complete it? Otherwise, when he has laid a

foundation, and is not able to finish, all who see it begin to mock him, saying,

‘This man began to build and was not able to finish.’ … So therefore, whoever of

you does not renounce all that he has cannot be my disciple” (Luke 14:28, 29,

30, 33).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

1. Why is it ridiculous to start building something without finding out how much it

will cost?

2. What will it cost you to be a real Christian?

3. Are you willing to sacrifice everything (popularity, wealth, comfort, dreams) in

order to follow Jesus?

Receiving Jesus

The great gift of God was His Son. The great response of man is receiving Jesus.

Taking Jesus into your life made you a Christian. You believed God's Word, and as

an act of faith, accepted Jesus as your Savior. Because of this, God miraculously

changed the direction of your life.

This is not the end of your responsibility though. Study the Bible to find out how

children of God are supposed to act and what characteristics they are to have. You

will notice that we are to be totally obedient to our Heavenly Father and totally

dependent on Him. Even if this is not yet part of your experience, believe God's

Word. Recognize that Jesus will work in you. Jesus lives within you to make you the

kind of child that would bring honor to His name.

Know what God expects of you and don’t try to live up to manmade rules. You

don’t always have to be serious, somber, and studious because Mrs. McFrown says

you should be. You don’t have to wear 1950s styles because Aunt Tillie thinks you'd

look better if you did. But you do have to love your enemies when right now you

hate them. This is just one of many situations in which you will have to receive

Jesus and His power in order to become God's obedient child.

“But to all who received him, who believed in His name, He gave power to

become children of God” (John 1:12).

“Behold, I stand at the door and knock; if anyone hears my voice and opens

the door, I will come in to him and eat with him, and he with me” (Revelation

3:20).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

1. If we open the door to Jesus, what does He promise?

2. Jesus will come into our lives, in the first place, to save us. But Jesus may still be

knocking on doors that lead to secret compartments in your life. “May I go with

you on your date tonight?” “May I control your eating habits?” “Would you let

me show you how to spend your money?” “Would you obey me by respecting

your parents?” Are you locking Jesus out of any area of your life?

3. Eating together symbolizes fellowship, partnership, and belonging to the same

social class. Jesus wants to be your best Friend. He wants you to share your

dreams and fears and hopes with Him, and to let Him direct you in everything.

Do you have that kind of relationship with Him now?

But Don’t Look in the Closet

Christ lives in your heart because you exercised faith – you let Him in. Someone

has written a beautiful booklet that compares your heart to a huge house. Even after

you let Jesus into your heart “house,” you will discover that there are still more

rooms to give to Him. Although becoming a Christian means giving Jesus your life,

few people realize what that means. Jesus is usually invited into the “living room”

and treated more like a guest than a landlord.

Little by little, Jesus shows us that He has a right to determine what goes on in the

“recreation room” and to decide what is served in the “dining room”. He even has

the right to clean out the “closets” – to make you apologize for past words, to pay for

things you’ve stolen, and to try to make things right with people you’ve wronged.

He has glorious plans to remodel and redecorate your heart home – plans that are

greater than you’ve ever dreamed of.

Most of all, Jesus wants to be your constant Companion, showing you His love

continually. Let Jesus clean out your closets, make your plans, and share His life

with you.

“To them God chose to make known … the glory of this mystery, which is

Christ in you, the hope of glory” (Colossians 1:27).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

“And that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being

rooted and grounded in love, may have power to comprehend with all the saints

what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of

Christ, which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of

God” (Ephesians 3:17-19).

1. How does Christ live in our hearts?

2. Love makes a house a home, and it’s love that transforms your heart house. What

is the Source of real love?

3. Jesus can put love in your heart that keeps on growing and that is outside the

realm of human understanding. What wrong attitudes are preventing the love of

Jesus from growing in you?

Your Gift to God

Have you ever tried to “un-give” a present? You don’t give your mother a

beautiful plant for Mother’s Day and then proceed to tell her, “I'll keep it up in my

room because I'll take better care of it than you will.” You’ve been taught from the

first birthday party you attended that if you give something away, you don’t take it

back again.

Now this also holds true for your commitment to Jesus, and it’s good to renew it

each day, saying, “Jesus, I have given myself to you. I will follow you and serve you

– I am totally yours.” If you sin after making this surrender, don’t think that your

surrender was insincere. It’s because you are still learning how to trust Jesus and to

give yourself to Him. Ask His forgiveness and reaffirm your surrender to Him.

Don’t hold anything back. Confess every sin to Him. Give Him your mind and

your thought life, your mouth and the words you say, as well as your heart and your

love, your job, your schoolwork, your computer, your motorcycle, and even your

hairdryer. He has a right to all you are, all you do, and all you own. If you give it,

Jesus will take it; and what He takes, He will care for.

I’d give you a rainbow

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

If I had many colors,

But alas my sky is gray.

I’d give you a lark

To greet your sunrise,

But wings were made to be free.

I’d give you a mountain,

Blue and majestic,

But all I have is one stone.

I will give you my life, Lord.

My gift to you is me.

- Patrice Joncas

“But first they gave themselves to the Lord” (2 Corinthians 8:5).

“And he said to all, ‘If any man would come after me, let him deny himself

and take up his cross daily and follow me. For whoever would save his life will

lose it; and whoever loses his life for my sake, he will save it’” (Luke 9:23, 24).

1. Why do you actually lose your life when you approach everything with a selfish

“me first” attitude?

2. Can you think of an instance in which denying yourself for the moment to obey

God will not only guard you for eternal life but also protect you from trouble

right here on earth?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

3. Can you think of two difficult things which you might face this week if you

really follow Jesus?

Lord, May I Change My Mind?

“I don’t particularly feel like being a Christian today.” The girl who said that

expressed something most people feel at some time or another. There could be a

number of reasons for this feeling. You may want to sneak out when your parents

have grounded you, even though you know God commands you to obey them.

Goofing around in geometry class may be more fun than doing your assignment, in

spite of the fact that if Jesus physically walked into class, you'd start doing the

problems. Or maybe it’s a party you’ve been invited to; you'd like to go because all

the popular kids are invited, but you know it won't be a party a Christian should

attend.

Sometimes it seems so hard to be a Christian that you'd rather not try than try and

fail. When you're afraid that you can't hold out as a Christian, you're forgetting that

God is all-powerful, and that it’s not your ability to hold onto Him that matters, but

His ability to hold on to you.

If you’ve given your life to Jesus, the Holy Spirit is at work inside you. Just as a

kitten or a pine tree grows large because of the life inside, so you grow as a Christian

because of the life of the Holy Spirit inside you. Choosing to sin will squelch that

life inside you, but you can choose to obey. The formula for going on with Jesus is

very old and very simple – “trust and obey.”

“Jesus said to him, ‘No one who put his hand to the plow and looks back is fit

for the kingdom of God’” (Luke 9:62).

“For God is at work in you, both to will and to work for His good pleasure”

(Philippians 2:13).

“Let us know, let us press on to know the Lord; His going forth is sure as the

dawn; He will come to us as the showers, as the spring rains that water the earth”

(Hosea 6:3).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

1. What specific area in your life will require your willingness to obey if God is

going to change it?

2. What command is given in Hosea 6:3?

3. If you are really trying to obey God, how certain can you be that God will come

to you?

You Can Be Sure

Back in high school I remember talking to a girlfriend about heaven. When I

told her that I was certain that Jesus was in my life and that I was going to heaven,

she said, “But that’s presuming a lot; it sounds like a pretty proud attitude.” If my

status depended on my good works and flawless character, “proud” would be an

understatement. But, we are saved by faith and not by works.

God does not grade on the curve. The Bible states that, “you have been saved

through faith … not because of works, lest any man should boast” (Ephesians 2:8,

9). God tells us in many places in the Bible that He will forgive us and make us His

children if we confess our sins and make Him the Lord of our lives. When God says

it He means it.

There is nothing humble about calling God a liar. You don’t like it when

someone doubts your word; you don’t want people to think that you lie. Then how

can we doubt God's Word? Unbelief in Jesus’ power to save is nothing less than

treating Him as a liar. Jesus commands us to be born again. He wouldn’t command

something that wasn’t possible. He promised to give eternal life to anyone who

believes in Him and He means it. If you completely turned your life over to Jesus,

He came into your heart BECAUSE HE SAID HE WOULD.

“Truly, truly I say to you, he who hears my word and believes Him who sent

me, has eternal life; he does not come into judgment, but has passed from death

to life” (John 5:24).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

“He who believes in the Son of God has the testimony in himself. He who

does not believe God, has made him a liar, because he has not believed in the

testimony that God has borne to his Son. And this is the testimony, that God gave

us eternal life, and this life is in his Son. He who has the Son has life; he who has

not the Son of God has not life. I write this to you who believe in the name of the

Son of God, that you may know that you have eternal life” (1 John 5:10-13).

1. What is the only way you can know that you're going to heaven?

2. John wanted his readers to know that they had eternal life. How can something

written 1900 years ago help you to have assurance of eternal life?

Assurance

The night you invited Christ into your life, you felt so clean inside and so full

of joy. God seemed so near that you were sure you could never doubt Him again.

But then you had to go back to “real life.” There was Friday’s book report, and you

hadn’t even picked out a book to read. As usual, every dish in the house seemed

dirty the night it was your turn to do the dishes, and you complained the whole time.

The boss yelled at you at work, and life seemed no different from before. You heard

the devil’s sneering whisper, “See – you're no different. You're not a Christian after

all!” you might even have answered, “Well, I surely don’t feel any different.”

Maybe the beautiful bride feels no different after the trip to the altar either.

Three days later, with a terrible sore throat and a temperature of 103 degrees she

may not feel one bit married. But the fact is, she is married. If she keep’s acting on

that fact, sooner or later she’ll feel married.

If you truly accepted Christ, you are God's child, regardless of your feelings.

Trust that fact. Also remember that even if you're still a child of the King of Kings,

if you stay close to Jesus, you will grow and mature in your Christian life. But if you

keep doubting that you are a Christian, you'll never grow.

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

“Therefore, if any one is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has passed

away, behold the new has come” (2 Corinthians 5:17).

“Jesus said to her, ‘Your brother will rise again.’ Martha said to him, ‘I know

that he will rise again in the resurrection at the last day.’ Jesus said to her, ‘I am

the resurrection and the life; he who believes in me, though he die, yet shall he

live, and whoever lives and believes in me shall never die. Do you believe this?’

She said to him, ‘Yes Lord; I believe that you are the Christ, the Son of God, he

who is coming into the world’” (John 11:23-27).

1. What promise did Jesus give Martha?

2. What did Martha believe?

3. How would Jesus have felt if Martha would have said, “I don’t feel anything.

You can't expect me to believe I have eternal life without giving me proof”?

4. Will you put your faith in Jesus and His work instead of in your feelings?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

WEEK THREE

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE!

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

If You Have Jesus, You Have Everything

You may have seen the greeting card showing two contented children with the

caption. “If you have Jesus, you have everything.” Begin each new day with that

thought. You may feel like a little lost lamb in a big bad world, but Jesus, your

Shepherd, is with you whether you need forgiveness, help with a problem, or

someone to love you. If you fall, He’ll help you in temptation and guide you into His

perfect will.

Let Jesus be your Shepherd. Let Him be everything to you.

In Him is all I need.

In Him is all I need.

His abundance for my emptiness,

And His life for my lifelessness.

His love for my coldness,

And His light for my darkness.

His truth for my deceit,

And His joy for my sadness.

His victory for my defeat,

And his rest for my restlessness.

- Translated from the German by Gerdi Sirtl

“He who did not spare His own Son but gave Him up for us all, will He not

also give us all things with Him?” (Romans 8:32)

“Though I myself have reason for confidence in the flesh also. If any other

man thinks he has reason for confidence in the flesh, I have more: circumcised on

the eighth day, of the people of Israel, of the tribe of Benjamin, a Hebrew born of

Hebrews; as to the law a Pharisee, as to zeal a persecutor of the church, as to

righteousness under the law blameless. But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss

for the sake of Christ. Indeed I count everything as loss because of the surpassing

worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord. For his sake I have suffered the loss of

all things, and count them as refuse, in order that I may gain Christ” (Philippians

3:4-8).

1. What things did Paul give up in order to follow Jesus?

2. Why did Paul feel it was worth it?

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3. Is there anything in your life you're holding onto because you don’t trust Jesus to

be everything?

Green Pastures and Still Waters

Jesus promises to give us peace. Most of us think of peace as vacationing on a

Caribbean island or being able to sleep until noon on Saturday morning. Yet if peace

means escape, the only way to get it is to drop out of regular day-to-day living, with

its overdue library books, traffic jams, and tight schedules. Fortunately, Jesus offers

peace that the world can't give – peace when your mother yells at you, peace when

the car runs out of gas, and peace when the band bus leaves without you – peace in

the middle of pressure.

An artist once portrayed “peace” as a little bird content in a nest on the end of

an oak branch sticking out over roaring Niagara Falls. That is peace.

There is an interesting verse in Psalms: “Blessed are the men whose strength

is in thee, in whose heart are the highways to Zion” (Psalm 84:5). Zion was the hill

in Jerusalem where God's temple stood. The temple was filled with the peace and

presence of God. It was impossible to camp out in the temple all the time. However,

since God is the Source of peace, turning our thoughts to Him makes a “highway to

Zion” in our hearts.

Paul commands us to “let the peace of Christ rule” in our hearts. If you keep

your mind on Jesus and you look to Him in faith, you'll find green pastures and still

waters, even in the middle of the fifth-hour English class and other unexpected

places.

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want; he makes me lie down in green

pastures. He leads me beside the still waters; He restores my soul. He leads me in

paths of righteousness for His name’s sake. Even though I walk through the

valley of the shadow of death, I fear no evil; for thou art with me, they rod and

thy staff, they comfort me. Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of

my enemies; thou anointest my head with oil, my cup overflows. Surely goodness

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life; and I shall dwell in the house

of the Lord forever.” (Psalm 23)

1. List ten things you shouldn’t have to worry about.

2. What do “green pastures” mean for your life?

3. In what area of your life do you need the peace of Jesus today?

Your Best Friend – Jesus

Do you ever feel like the kid who sings, “Nobody loves me. Everybody hates

me. I’m going to go eat worms.”? If you answered “yes”, join the human race.

Loneliness and that “no one understands me” feeling are very common. Sometimes

the people whom you think are your friends let you down. Other times they are too

occupied with their own problems to notice that you need special help. Even if

someone takes the time to try to help you, that person is often unable to understand

your feelings.

Jesus wants to be your Friend and constant Companion, the One with whom

you share your plans, your dreams, your failures, your sin, and your problems. Not

only does He understand you perfectly, but He has all power, and can direct you in

the right way and show you how to get out of the mess you got yourself into.

Jesus will always be your Friend – no matter what. He’ll be the honest Friend

who lets you know when you're doing something wrong, the comforting Friend to

whom you can pour out your heart, and the Counselor who will help you make your

future plans.

Good friends spend a lot of time together. Jesus can't help you if you don’t

talk to Him, and He can't advise you if you don’t listen to Him. You need a Friend

like Jesus. Take the time to get to know Him.

“No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his

master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my

Father I have made known to you” (John 15:15).

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

“For he has said, ‘I will never leave you or forsake you’” (Hebrews 13:5).

“Fear not, for I am with you, be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will

strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my victorious right hand”

(Isaiah 41:10).

“No man shall be able to stand before you all the days of your life; as I was

with Moses, so I will be with you; I will not fail you or forsake you” (Joshua

1:5).

1. How do you know that Jesus is always with us?

2. Because Jesus is always with us, what commands are we given?

3. During the next week, what should you do differently because you know Jesus is

your friend?

Happiness Is Jesus

Do you want to be happy? You might respond, “That’s a dumb question. Of

course, everyone wants to be happy.”

God loves you and wants to give you real joy, but like everything God has for

us, it must be on His terms, not ours. If you're looking for gladness, you won't find

it, because you're looking for a feeling, for something within yourself. Look to Jesus,

follow Jesus, believe in Jesus, and joy becomes automatic. Gladness is only proof

that something really satisfies you. Does your happiness come from the fact that

Jesus really satisfies you and that you enjoy doing His will?

In the Bible, light and joy usually go together. You can even see a glow on the

face of a person who is genuinely happy. When gloom descends it’s because of one

of these reasons: (1.) ignorance of all God can do; (2.) doubt that God can work in a

tough situation; (3.) unwillingness to give up everything to Jesus; (4.) sin.

God can give you joy and light in the middle of absolutely terrible

circumstances; there are Christians around who prove it by their lives. I'll never

forget Helen. I met her once when I was eighteen. Helen was a hunchbacked lady,

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

caring for her dying mother in a rickety old house on an out-of-the-way farm. She

had never been able to realize her dream of attending a Bible school, and now found

herself in a very lonely and difficult situation. Helen’s face was beaming and she

talked constantly of the Lord and His many blessings. She knew that if she had

Jesus, it was possible for her to find all her happiness in Him.

Jesus assured us that whoever follows Him “Shall not walk in darkness.”

Deep-down joy doesn’t necessarily mean absence of pain and heartache. Only

hopelessness causes depression – but the Christian can always have hope and faith in

any situation because God is all-powerful.

“The joy of the Lord is your strength” (Nehemiah 8:10).

“And he said to them, ‘Did you receive the Holy Spirit when you believed?’

And they said, ‘No, we have never even heard that there is a Holy Spirit’” (Acts

19:2).

“And he did not do many mighty works there because of their unbelief”

(Matthew 13:58).

“If you keep my commandments, you will abide in my love, just as I have

kept my Father’s commandments and abide in His love. These things I have

spoken to you, that my joy may be in you, and that your joy may be full” (John

15:10, 11).

1. What are some reasons for Christians not experiencing joy?

2. Which of these reasons do you feel is your biggest problem at the moment? Ask

God to show you what to do about it.

This Job Takes Jesus

A six-year-old boy was terrified to walk past the house of a big bully. This

bully would always beat him up. Then one day the boy’s fifteen-year-old brother

walked with him past the house. The bully never even appeared.

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

The six-year-old was safe as long as he was accompanied by his brother. But

one day he became overconfident and decided to go past the home of the big bully

all by himself. He was badly beaten up. At first he was afraid to tell his big brother,

but when he did, the big brother taught the bully a lesson. He also instructed his little

brother never to walk by that house alone again.

Jesus intends that we have victory over sin – not once in a while, but

constantly. If we approach life in our own strength, sin will defeat us just as the

bully beat up the child. However, Jesus within us is all-powerful and He has never

yet lost a fight with the devil.

Stay close to Jesus and be afraid to venture into anything without His presence

and approval. Bring every sin to Him. Never try to deal with it yourself. It is as

ridiculous for you to try to deal with sin by yourself as it is for a beaten-up six-year-

old to take on a big bully. Jesus will forgive you and give you strength for the next

time. Jesus is a Savior from sin. You don’t overcome sin with a little help from

Jesus, but when Jesus himself lives within you, He can insure victory over sin.

“And you shall call his name Jesus, for He will save His people from their

sins” (Matthew 1:21).

“I confess my iniquity, I am sorry for my sin” (Psalm 38:18).

“I can do all things in Him who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).

1. Why is it sometimes difficult to confess sin?

2. Why is it necessary to confess sin?

3. Once your sin is confessed and forgiven, what can Jesus do through you?

4. Reread Philippians 4:13 several times, replacing “all things” with something

specific in your life. For example, “I can study for the geometry test through

Christ who strengthens me.”

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Are There Any Goliaths in Your Life?

Breaking that date for Friday night, saying “no” to drugs, starting the

homework that’s due on Friday, or replacing the stolen bike sometimes can seem

like beady-eyed nine-foot-high giants. Life is full of Goliaths. Jesus is the One with

the power to win the victory over each of them, and He wants to give that power to

us.

The story is told of a mother who visited her son’s dormitory room at college.

She was disappointed to see the walls filled with immoral pictures. She said nothing

but mailed her son a present – a beautifully framed picture of his favorite Bible

verse. He put it on the wall, and as he looked at it, he thought of Jesus. He was

forced to take down the other pictures. The power of Jesus is like that – it wins over

wrong thinking and sinful actions.

The power of Jesus is not just for facing emergencies and full-grown Goliaths.

Do you realize that Goliath was once a cute, helpless little baby? The most innocent

or potentially worthwhile thing can become a monster unless it is under the control

and guidance of Jesus.

Even a search for love can turn into a horrible experience if Jesus is not in charge of

it.

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Take all your plans, all your decisions, and all your temptations to Jesus. Let

Jesus fight the Goliaths in your life.

“And Jesus came and said to them, ‘All authority in heaven and on earth has

been given to me’” (Matthew 28:18).

“Then David said to the Philistine, ‘You come to me with a sword and with a

spear and with a javelin; but I come to you in the name of the Lord of hosts, the

God of the armies of Israel, whom you have defied. This day the Lord will

deliver you into my hand…’ And David put his hand in his bag and took out a

stone, and slung it, and struck the Philistine on his forehead; the stone sank into

his forehead, and he fell on his face to the ground” (1 Samuel 17:45, 46, 49).

1. Why do you think David won his fight with Goliath?

2. What are the giants in your life right now? Are you facing them the way David

faced Goliath?

3. What might have been the ending of this story if David had trusted in his own

strength?

I Am Weak but He is Strong

Jesus wants to be your strength, but He can't be unless you let Him. In order to

let Jesus be your strength, you must be weak – by God's definition; you must

recognize that you are unable to live the Christian life – period. It is not a matter of

desperately trying to be kind to a crabby boss and getting a little help from Jesus to

push you over the top. It is not witnessing like mad in your own strength and getting

a tich of God's power to keep going. No, it’s recognizing that Jesus meant it when

He said, “Apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5).

Sometimes, we use the word “weakness” to cover up sins. A little child who

comes in from playing doesn’t usually get by with saying, “I'm too weak to clean my

room.” Spending time in Bible study and not helping others is not due to

“weakness.” It’s more accurate to say, “I'm too lazy,” or, “I think other things are

more important.”

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

A child who struggles to put his shoe on the wrong foot, disregarding his

mother’s instruction, is not weak. He is disobedient. You may be trying to do

something God doesn’t want you to do; you can't expect His strength for that. If your

mother baked a birthday cake for your younger sister, asking you not to touch it,

your eating three pieces before the party is not weakness; it is pure selfishness.

If you want God's strength, you can have it. First of all, stop calling sin

“laziness” and disobedience “weakness.” Second, recognize that you don’t just need

some help from Jesus – you need Him to do the whole thing, from beginning to end.

Now, this does not mean sitting in a chair for the next twenty years until a voice

from heaven tells you to stand up. It does mean recognizing that you can't drive a

car, wash the dishes, take a test, or call your girlfriend in such a way as to glorify

and honor God unless you admit your complete dependence on Him. Of course, you

can physically accomplish any of these things. It’s pleasing God that you cannot do

on your own. Just as you would constantly seek the guidance of your teacher while

performing an experiment with explosives, so you should realize that the

relationships and responsibilities of life require God's supervision if they are not to

blow up in your face.

Once you acknowledge your weakness, by faith claim God's strength. God

promises strength for the weak. He has enough strength no matter what you're

facing, as long as you don’t rely on your own resources. Andrew Murray puts it this

way, “The Christian is strong in His Lord – not sometimes strong and sometimes

weak, but always weak and therefore always strong.”

“My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness” (2

Corinthians 12:9).

“But Peter said, ‘I have no silver or gold, but I give you what I have; in the

name of Jesus Christ of Nazareth, walk.’ And he took him by the right hand and

raised him up; and immediately his feet and ankles were made strong. And

leaping up he stood and walked and entered the temple with them, walking and

leaping and praising God” (Acts 3:6-8).

1. What did Jesus do for the lame man?

2. What sin in your life have you been excusing as “weakness”? Confess it to the

Lord as sin and begin to obey God in that area.

3. For what do you need the strength of Jesus today? Ask Him for it.

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WEEK FOUR

HOW TO WIN THE WAR

AGAINST SIN

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When It’s Legal to Hate

Do you hate sin? God does. You might hear someone say, “Why does God let

little children starve and suffer?” However, the real culprit is sin. It was greed that

started the war, alcoholism that misspent the money, and uncontrolled anger that

caused the beating. A heresy of our day teaches that finally even the devil will go to

heaven! The devil is the author of sin and delights in seeing starving children,

broken homes, and misunderstood teenagers. You should hate the devil and hate sin.

Sin hurts God and makes people unhappy. If you are to talk to God at all, the

first thing you must bring to Him is your sin. You had to confess your sin and bring

it to Jesus in order to become a Christian. As a child of God, confession of sin is one

of your greatest privileges. God's holiness actually eradicates sin. His holiness is like

fire that consumes evil, or a spot remover that erases every stain.

Our first tendency is to cover sin or to try to lessen its impact. Have you

noticed that the kid who cheated on the test goes out of his way to be nice to the

teacher? If you stay out past the time you promised you'd be in, isn’t it easier to do

the dishes for your mother than to tell her the truth? But sin is so terrible that you

can't cover it, patch it up, or rework it. It’s like rotting garbage. The only thing to do

with it is throw it away. But you can never get rid of your sin unless you are

completely honest with God and with people you have wronged.

“He who conceals his transgressions (sins) will not prosper, but he who

confesses and forsakes them will find mercy” (Proverbs 28:13).

“When I declared not my sin, my body wasted away through my groaning all

day long. For day and night thy hand was heavy upon me; my strength was dried

up as by the heat of summer. I acknowledged my sin to thee, and I did not hide

my iniquity; I said, ‘I will confess my transgressions to the Lord’; then thou did

forgive the guilt of my sin” (Psalm 32:3-5).

1. What are the symptoms of a person who is trying to cover up unconfessed sin?

2. Just as pain tells you to pull your hand off the hot stove, guilt reveals the sin you

must get rid of. If a person refused to take his or her hand off the hot stove and

yet kept complaining about the pain, no one would be very sympathetic.

Somehow, though, we will do everything with our guilt feelings except confess

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our sin. Confess any covered-up sins to God – and to people you’ve wronged.

Then accept God's forgiveness and refuse to entertain more guilt.

Does This Shake You Up a Little?

Do you know what God thinks about “little white lies”? A “little white lie” is

a dangerous sin that can break your communication with God and damage your

relationships with other people. The Bible tells the story of Ananias and Sapphira, a

nice Jerusalem couple who sold their land and gave the money to the church. Now

that’s a very generous thing to do. There was just one problem – they pretended to

give all the money, when they really gave only part of it. When Ananias told this

“little white lie,” Peter answered, “You have not lied to men but to God.” When

Ananias heard these words, he dropped dead. That is probably the reason why Noah

and the ark is a much more popular Bible story!

Maybe you'd better look at your own life. Do you lie to give false

impressions? Do you exaggerate to make people listen to your stories? Do you hint

that you are a better ball player than you really are? Would your comments lead

others to think that you had more dates than a palm tree? Confess these lies to God.

Remember that He loves you exactly the way you are, and it isn’t necessary to give a

false impression to Him, or anyone. Also ask Him to help you overcome any

bragging habits you have established. Never justify your “little white lies.” Confess

them as sin and determine to tell the truth.

“Be sure your sin will find you out” (Numbers 32:23).

“After an interval of about three hours his wife came, not knowing what had

happened. And Peter said to her, ‘Tell me whether you sold the land for so

much.’ And she said, ‘Yes, for so much.’ But Peter said to her, ‘How is it that

you have agreed together to tempt the Spirit of the Lord? Hark, the feet of those

that have buried your husband are at the door, and they will carry you out.’

Immediately she fell down at his feet and died. When the young men came in

they found her dead, and they carried her out and buried her beside her husband.

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And great fear came upon the whole church, and upon all who heard of these

things” (Acts 5:7-11).

1. How do we know that Ananias and Sapphira were guilty of “premeditated

lying”?

2. Do you ever find it easier to go along with something that is not completely

honest because another Christian suggests it?

3. Do you have a real fear of saying or doing something that is not entirely honest?

Even If They Stone You

The Scarlet Letter, not a popular book nowadays, is an early American novel

in Puritan Massachusetts. In the story a young minister fathers an illegitimate child.

He is suspected by no one and the mother will not disclose his identity. The young

minister says from the pulpit that he is the worst of sinners; he constantly condemns

himself. At the same time, he refuses to do the one necessary thing – make a direct

confession of his specific sin before God and the people, with the intention of facing

the consequences. Because he refused to do this, he was most miserable. Finally, his

approaching death made him confess publicly, but he had no time to enjoy his clear

conscience.

Actually, it would be better to say nothing than to repeat, “and Jesus, forgive

all my sins,” every night for five years. It’s better to tell God that you have nothing

to confess than to confess just for the sake of confessing. Ask the Holy Spirit to

point out specific sin in your life. Confess that sin to God – and to another person if

you have wronged him or her.

Whenever you feel guilty, ask the Holy Spirit to show you if you’ve done

something specifically wrong. Ask with an attitude of willingness to face God

honestly. If God doesn’t show you anything, then dismiss the guilty feeling. That

“yucky” worthless feeling, which is vague and uncertain, comes from the devil.

Ignore it and forget it. However, the conviction of specific sin is from the Holy

Spirit and must be dealt with immediately.

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“Against thee, and thee only, have I sinned, and done that which is evil in thy

sight, so that thou are justified in thy sentence and blameless in thy judgment”

(Psalm 51:4).

“And Achan answered Joshua, ‘Of a truth I have sinned against the Lord God

of Israel, and this is what I did: when I saw among the spoil a beautiful mantle

from Shinar, and two hundred shekels of silver, and a bar of gold weighing fifty

shekels, then I coveted them and took them; and behold, they are hidden in the

earth inside my tent …’ And all Israel stoned him with stones” (Joshua 7:20, 21,

25)

1. Notice how specific Achan’s confession of his sin was. How do you think he felt

after he confessed?

2. Are your confessions of sin specific or general?

3. God could not bless Israel again until Achan’s sin was dealt with. In view of that,

and in view of the eternal consequences of sin, was Achan’s confession worth it,

even if it sealed his death?

But …

Are you able to talk yourself into and out of almost anything? Can you think

of sixty-nine good reasons for not doing your history lesson? Are you able to defend

yourself for ten minutes straight when your mother mentions that a bulldozer may be

needed to get your room cleaned out? Can you rationalize that running with a rowdy

group of friends won't hurt you?

If you decide to prove that everything you do is okay, you will hurt yourself

immeasurably. People who are really good at rationalizing won't take advice – but

it’s amazing what you can learn from other people if you listen.

Jesus demanded a “no ifs, ands, or buts” obedience from His disciples. If you

keep making excuses, you won't obey your parents, your teachers, or God. Probably

the worst thing about an excuse-maker is that he or she can't really ask God for

forgiveness. If you can't admit that you're dead wrong and that you need forgiveness,

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God won't forgive you. Your confession can't be, “God, if you had to live with my

sister, you'd blow your stack too – and besides, she started it. By the way, I’d like

forgiveness for getting angry.” God wants you to deal directly and honestly with

your sin. No excuses are allowed.

“For he flatters himself in his own eyes that his iniquity (sin) cannot be found

out and hated” (Psalm 36:2).

“But he said to him, ‘A man once gave a banquet, and invited many; and at

the time for the banquet he sent his servant to say to those who had been invited,

“Come; for all is now ready.” But they all alike began to make excuses. The first

said to him, “I have bought a field, and I must go out and see it; I pray you, have

me excused.” And another said, “I have bought five yoke of oxen, and I go to

examine them; I pray you, have me excused.” And another said, “I have married

a wife, and therefore I cannot come.” (Luke 14:16-20).

1. Since oxen and fields can wait, and women love to go out to eat, what were these

excuse-makers really saying?

2. Jesus is asking you to follow Him completely and to be frank and honest about

your sin. What excuses do you have for not obeying?

3. Why do excuses keep you from seeing yourself as you really are?

4. What is the real motive behind the excuses you are giving God for your

disobedience to Him? Talk this over with Him, asking Him to help you stop

making excuses.

Eve Made Me Do It

I walked into the principal’s office just in time to hear a good-looking blond

boy’s, “But he started it!” cut off by the principal’s booming voice; “I don’t care

what the other guy did. I want to know what you did.” Just as the student had to face

the principal because of his own actions, each of us must face God, knowing that we

are responsible for our own deeds; we can't blame anybody else.

My father tells about the first lie he ever heard my sister tell. “Chickie did it.

Don’t spank me.” She was barely two. No one has to teach us to cover up for our

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mistakes and sins. That comes naturally. If we don’t stop blaming other people, we

will never build an honest and healthy relationship with God. It doesn’t matter if it is

ninety-five percent the fault of the other person. God expects us to confess our part

to Him and to apologize to the other person – and not in such a way as to force an

apology in return.

We are not responsible for making other people confess their sins. We are

only responsible for ourselves. One of the devil’s best tricks to keep us from having

pure hearts is getting us to concentrate on the faults and sins of others. If God had a

loudspeaker in the sky to give us constant audible advice, I think we’d often hear,

“MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS.” Confess your sin without blaming anyone but

yourself.

“When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, ‘Lord, what about this man?’ Jesus

said to him, ‘If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? Follow

me!’” (John 21:21, 22).

“Who are you to pass judgment on the servant of another? It is before his own

master that he stands or falls. And he will be upheld, for the Master is able to

make him stand” (Romans 14:4).

“The soul that sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the

father, nor the father suffer for the iniquity of the son; the righteousness of the

righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon

himself” (Ezekiel 18:20).

1. Why is it so easy to blame others for our own failures?

2. Why do we find it easier to excuse ourselves for wrongdoing than to excuse

others?

3. If you have been blaming your parents, your church, your school, or your friends

for the way you act, talk to God about your attitude. Do exactly what He tells you

to do.

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Do You Enjoy Being Kidnapped?

Not long ago, the newspapers carried the story of a wealthy Italian girl who

was kidnapped. Her parents came up with the ransom money, only to find that she

liked being with her kidnapper! She refused to be freed.

Do you enjoy your sin? Do you find self-pity comforting? Do you appreciate

the way your temper helps you get your own way? Do you find that dwelling on

unclean thoughts is an enjoyable pastime? If you answered “yes”, you'd have to

admit that confession of these sins wouldn’t be completely sincere. Real confession

implies willingness to stop sinning – willingness to hate the sin you're confessing.

You still might fall sometimes. However, there is a great difference between trying

to go through every red light without getting caught and determining never to go

through a red light again, though unconsciously breaking the law a few times.

Treat even the thought of sin like a traffic light that has turned red – stop

before you get into it. If you have decide always to stop at red lights, your conscious

decision soon becomes subconscious, and obeying traffic lights becomes easier and

easier. Set your mind completely against sin. Be willing to take any action necessary

to follow God. Don’t just confess sin. Determine to stop doing it.

“And put on the new nature, created after the likeness of God in true

righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:24).

“When you spread forth your hands, I will hide my eyes from you; even

though you make many prayers, I will not listen; your hands are full of blood.

Wash yourselves; make yourselves clean; remove the evil of your doings from

before my eyes; cease to do evil, learn to do good; seek justice, correct

oppression; defend the fatherless, plead for the widow. Come now, let us reason

together, says the Lord: though your sins are like scarlet, they shall be as white as

snow; though they are red like crimson, they shall become like wool” (Isaiah

1:15-18).

1. Why wouldn’t God listen to the prayers of His people, according to Isaiah 1?

2. Is there any reason why God won't listen to your prayers?

3. God wants you not only to stop doing wrong, but also to “learn to do good.”

What kind of student are you when it comes to learning to do right?

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Repent? You’ve Got To Be Kidding!

I'll never forget it. At a senior high Bible camp, as we silently sat around the

campfire, God's power became very real, and his Holy Spirit began convicting

people of sin.

A seventeen-year-old boy who had been one of the troublemakers started sobbing

and saying, “I'm a terrible sinner.” “I'm a terrible sinner.” That night kids not only

confessed sin, they also genuinely repented.

Repentance means turning around and going in the opposite direction. Those

kids were serious about giving their lives to God. Dates were cancelled so campers

could go back to their cabins to pray and apologize for wrong things they had said or

done. The next day camp seemed a little bit like heaven. The whole atmosphere had

changed.

Repentance always includes these things: (1.) a deep sense of sinfulness and a

realization that a holy God can't look upon our sin. A flippant “All have sinned so

I'm a sinner too – big deal” won't make it. We must recognize the seriousness of sin.

(2.) A desire to get rid of our sin badly enough to obey God – to do whatever He

says must be done. (3.) A determination to live our lives for Jesus and not for

ourselves. There must be a complete change of direction.

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You may not hear the word “repent” very often, but if you don’t experience

the ingredients of repentance, you'll never have a solid relationship with God.

“I tell you, No; but unless you repent you will all likewise perish” (Luke

13:3).

“Many also of those who were now believers came, confessing and divulging

their practices. And a number of those who practiced magic arts brought their

books together and burned them in the sight of all; and they counted the value of

them and found it came to fifty thousand pieces of silver. So the word of the Lord

grew and prevailed mightily” (Acts 19:18-20).

1. How do you know that those people in Acts really meant it when they confessed

their sin?

2. Do you have a book that needs to be thrown away, a “bridge” to burn, or a

friendship you must terminate?

3. From Acts 19:20, what is the result when people confess and then follow through

with action?

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

WEEK FIVE

THAT NASTY STUFF

CALLED “SIN”

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IF GOD LOVES ME, WHY CAN’T I GET MY LOCKER OPEN?

Sin and Separation

Do you remember doing things such as avoiding Mr. Farnsworth for years

because you hit a baseball through his window when he was vacationing in

Colorado? Or trying to keep your mother from discovering that you had broken her

most beautiful vase? Or hoping you wouldn’t meet the kid whose bike you stole? If

you’ve ever done anything like that – and most of us have – you know how

uncomfortable the person you have wronged can make you feel, and even that

person knows nothing about what you have done.

Sin makes us feel very uncomfortable around God, and there is no way we can

hide what we have done from Him. YOU CAN NEVER GROW AS A CHRISTIAN

WITH UNCONFESSED SIN IN YOUR LIFE. It doesn’t matter if it is something

you did yesterday or whether it happened five years ago. To feel close to God again

you must clear up your sin.

If you think back on your life again, you may also be able to recall confessing

what you did and finding a beautiful relationship with another person completely

restored. When I was a child, my mother left an open can of red paint on the kitchen

floor while she went out into the yard. While she was gone, my sister and I were

running through the kitchen and dumped the whole thing over. We ran out to tell my

mother what had happened. She not only forgave us, but said, “When you do

something wrong, always tell me right away. Because you told me immediately, I

can clean up the floor without permanent damage. If you had tried to hide it, the

kitchen floor would have been red for years.”

When you do something wrong, remember the can of red paint. If you don’t

confess it immediately, it will do more harm and will be much harder to confess

later. If you have something from your past that must be made right, clear it up

immediately before it gets worse.

“If I had cherished iniquity in my heart, the Lord would not have listened”

(Psalm 66:18).

“Behold, the Lord’s hand is not shortened that it cannot save, or his ear dull

that it cannot hear; but your iniquities have made a separation between you and

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your God, and your sins have hid his face from you so that He does not hear”

(Isaiah 59:1, 2).

1. If you feel like avoiding Bible study, church services, and youth leaders, what

could be the reason?

2. Is there specific sin in your life that is separating you from God? What is it?

Hiding in the Garden Is Not Advised

The story of Adam and Eve is so familiar that we forget we can learn

something from it. We could title their experience, “All the Wrong Ways to Handle

Any Situation.” Adam and Eve did all the dumbest things. The sad part is that their

actions have been repeated millions of times.

Eve listened to the devil as he questioned God. That is very dangerous

because we are then assuming that we know more than God, and have the right to

revise His commandments. Eve hadn’t listened to God carefully enough to be sure

about what He had actually said. She inaccurately repeated His instructions.

Next, Eve believed the devil’s lies. What he said seemed logical so she bought

it. Remember that your logic is never better than God's.

Eve then desired the forbidden fruit. I've heard a mother say to her child,

“You can't have it, but it’s okay to want it.” That is not true when it comes to

temptation. If the devil can make you dwell on your desire to have something that’s

wrong, he has won half his battle.

Misery and sin like company. Eve not only sinned but also convinced Adam

to join in her sin. Then, instead of confessing, they made silly fig-leaf outfits and

played the first game of hide-and-seek! To say the least, God was not impressed.

Anything you do to try to hide your sin is just as ridiculous. You don’t have to

repeat the Garden of Eden experiment. The results are always the same.

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“Then desire when it has conceived, gives birth to sin; and sin when it is full

grown brings forth death.” (James 1:15).

“So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a

delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took

of its fruit and ate; and she also gave some to her husband, and he ate. Then the

eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked; and they sewed

fig leaves together and made themselves aprons. And they heard the sound of the

Lord God walking in the garden in the cool of the day and the man and his wife

hid themselves from the presence of the Lord God among the trees of the garden”

(Genesis 3:6-8).

1. What attitude did Adam and Eve have toward God after the sin?

2. How will sin affect your relationship with God?

3. In what ways have you tried to hide from God when you have sinned?

The Blood of Jesus

If your kidneys failed to function, the only way that you could hope to again

live a normal healthy life would be by receiving a kidney transplant. If I volunteered

to donate my kidney to you, you would really owe me your life. If you honestly

asked me what you could do to repay me and I told you to give me your antique

diamond ring, you'd be obligated to do exactly as I said. To me, that ring would be

the most valuable thing you could give me.

Have you ever wondered how the blood of Jesus can take away our sins? Has

the idea of sacrificing animals in the Old Testament to cover sin until Jesus died,

been a terribly difficult concept for you to understand? Blood is valuable to God

because He says it is. God created the world and He made the rules. We couldn’t

live without blood running through our veins; to give His blood for us, Jesus had to

die, showing how terrible sin is and how much it cost God to forgive us.

Yet, there is no completely logical way to figure out why blood is valuable to

God, so we must accept it by faith. Human logic would say that we should try to do

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enough good deeds to outweigh the bad ones. God says, “No.” Man’s idea is to show

penitence and remorse to try and make God feel sorry for us. But that isn’t

necessary. Jesus already shed His blood for our sins. You can't do a thing to make

yourself acceptable in God's sight. Only Jesus’ blood can remove your sin. That is

what is valuable to God.

“But if we walk in the light, as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one

another, and the blood of Jesus His Son cleanses us from all sin” (1 John 1:7).

“Indeed, under the law almost everything is purified with blood, and without

the shedding of blood there is no forgiveness of sins” (Hebrews 9:22).

“For this is my blood of the covenant (promise), which is poured out for many

for the forgiveness of sins” (Matthew 26:28).

1. What is God's requirement for the forgiveness of sins?

2. Do you really believe Jesus’ blood is what takes away your sins, or do you try to

feel bad, or do more good works to “make up” for what you’ve done?

3. Because Jesus gave His blood – His life – for you, what is the only logical thing

you can give Him in return?

So Satan Is Accusing You Again!

Do you hear the devil whispering discouraging things to you? He’ll suggest

things like, “God never forgave you – look how bad you are”; “You're a failure and

you might as well stop even trying to be a Christian”; “Don’t bother trying to

confess that sin. God won't even want to talk to you after this.”

Obviously, if we have done something wrong and refuse to be honest and

confess it, we should feel guilty – because we are. But I'm talking about that vague

feeling of failure and discouragement, or the constant rehashing of old sins you’ve

confessed before. The devil loves to accuse Christians, and he spends twenty-four

hours a day doing it. The reason we have so much trouble is that we fall for his

tricks.

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The devil might say, “You're a rotten Christian. You didn’t feel one bit like

helping that crabby neighbor, Mrs. Jones, carry in her groceries yesterday – and

Christians are supposed to love to help everybody.” Our usual reply is something

like, “Well, I did mow the lawn without my mother saying a word - so there.” Other

times we answer, “You're right. I'm a terrible, awful, lousy Christian who should flee

the planet.”

In both cases, we are trying to find righteousness and goodness within

ourselves, and the Bible teaches that it just isn’t there. The right answer for you to

give is, “Big deal, Satan. I've confessed that, and it’s Jesus’ blood that takes away

my sins and clears my conscience. I don’t expect to find something good inside me

because it just isn’t there. But Jesus has forgiven me, I never need to think of that sin

again. Besides, you were defeated by Jesus on the cross and will be completely

destroyed at the end of the world.”

“When he (the devil) lies, he speaks according to his own nature, for he is a

liar and the father of lies” (John 8:44).

“And the great dragon was thrown down, that ancient serpent who is called

the devil and Satan, the deceiver of the whole world – he was thrown down to the

earth, and his angels were thrown down with him. And I heard a loud voice in

heaven, saying, “Now the salvation and the power and the kingdom of our God

and the authority of his Christ have come, for the accuser of our brethren has

been thrown down, who accused them day and night before our God. And they

have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their

testimony, for they loved not their lives unto death” (Revelation 12:9-11).

1. What kinds of things does the devil do to discourage you?

2. According to Revelation 12, how can the devil be conquered?

But God is On My Side

When you have a hassle or a problem, it’s nice to have someone stick up for

you. The devil is always trying to condemn you. The comments of non-Christians

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are part of his ammunition: “After all, what can one expect of a fanatic.” “I thought

you were a Christian,” or, “But then, everyone from your church is weird.”

When you deliberately do wrong, you open the door for the devil because he

then has a definite reason to accuse you. Of course, he won't stop with the true

accusation. He’ll bring up some false ones also to completely wipe you out. As soon

as you confess your sin to God and claim Jesus’ blood, you can effectively resist the

devil’s accusations. Pray honestly, and if God doesn’t reveal any specific sin, ignore

Satan’s whispers. Then remember that God is on your side. He loves you, He

forgives you, and He sent Jesus to die for you.

You are working for God, not the devil. You would think it strange if the

manager of McDonalds came over to Burger King to tell one of the employees he

was making the French fries wrong. He would have no right to criticize the

employee of another company. God is the only One who has the right to criticize

you. If you are doing God's will, Satan’s whispers and the comments of other people

should not disturb you. God is your Boss. Serve Him faithfully and listen carefully

to His correction, always keeping in mind that He is on your side.

“With the Lord on my side I do not fear. What can man do to me?” (Psalm

118:6).

“What then shall we say to this? If God is for us, who is against us? He who

did not spare his own Son but gave him up for us all, will he not also give us all

things with him? Who shall bring any charge against God's elect? It is God who

justifies; who is to condemn? It is Christ Jesus, who died, yes, who was raised

from the dead, who is at the right hand of God, who indeed intercedes (prays) for

us” (Romans 8:31-34).

1. Why is God for us?

2. God has elected us, or chosen us, because He loves us. Who is the only one who

has the right to bring a charge against us or to condemn us?

3. Let God convict you of specific sin and confess it. Why is it wrong to accept the

devil’s condemning words?

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How Did I Become a Sinner?

Does sinning make you a sinner, or do you sin because you're a sinner? None

of us likes anger, jealousy, hatred, lying, or selfishness, and we are quite willing to

admit that they are bad. Nevertheless, we tend to think of ourselves as good people

who get angry only when we have a right to, who hate only people everybody else

would hate, and who lie only when we get into especially tough circumstances. Yet,

if you go on a “I'm-going-to-be-good” campaign, you'll find that something inside

you just wants to be bad. Benjamin Franklin tried to eliminate some bad traits by

spending a week overcoming each. He was surprised that his experiment failed.

The moment you first willfully disobeyed God, you became a sinner. You are

a student because you study, a person is a farmer because he farms, you are a sinner

because you sin.

There are a lot of inherited things about you that you can't help – freckles,

curly hair, a long nose – but not sin. You were born with imperfect judgment and

independent emotions, which don’t help the situation, but you chose to sin – just like

every other person on this planet.

“We have turned, every one to his own way” (Isaiah 53:6). That is why, in

yourself, you can't obey God. You're like a train that has headed itself down the

wrong track; the only way it can go the right way is for someone to pick it up and set

it on the right track.

If you'll give Jesus control of your life, He can put you “on track” to live in

victory.

“As it is written: ‘None is righteous (good), no, not one’” (Romans 3:10).

“And you he made alive, when you were dead through the trespasses and sins

in which you once walked, following the course of this world, following the

prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in the sons of

disobedience. Among these we all once lived in the passions of our flesh,

following the desires of body and mind, and so we were by nature children of

wrath like the rest of mankind. But God, who is rich in mercy, out of the great

love with which he loved us, even when we were dead through our trespasses,

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made us alive together with Christ (by grace you have been saved)” (Ephesians

2:1-5).

1. What are the characteristics of a person who is following “the course of this

world”?

2. How does Christ change our sinful natures and make us new people?

Whose Slave Are You?

Watching “Roots” on TV, or studying United States history can make you

hate slavery. In fact, maybe you couldn’t imagine anything worse than being a slave.

But did you know that millions of people are slaves today? Their master is sin, and

sin is a terrible master. It binds people until they are unable to make choices or see

truth.

I remember an object lesson I saw as a child. A visiting pastor picked out one

boy from the audience and tied the boy’s arms together with a strand of thread. It

was easy for the boy to break the thread. Winding the thread around him three times

made it a little harder to break. Finally, so many threads bound the boy’s arms

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together that he could do nothing. “Sin,” the pastor explained to us, “is like that

thread. It looks so harmless at first, but it takes away your freedom and makes you a

prisoner.”

If you know an alcoholic, a drug addict, or a very bitter person, you have seen

this principle at work. The only way to break away from sin is to get a new master –

Jesus Christ. If you obey Jesus, He gives you power to overcome sin. But you can't

be your own master and stay in the “middle of the road.” You must either be a slave

to sin or a slave of Christ. Whose slave are you?

“No one can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the

other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve

God and mammon (the false god of riches).” (Matthew 6:24)

“Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal bodies, to make you obey their

passions. Do not yield your members to sin as instruments of wickedness, but

yield yourselves to God as men who have been brought from death to life, and

your members to God as instruments of righteousness. For sin will have no

dominion over you since you are not under law but under grace. What then? Are

we to sin because we are not under law but under grace? By no means! Do you

not know that if you yield yourselves to any one as an obedient slave, you are

slaves of the one whom you obey, either of sin, which leads to death, or of

obedience, which leads to righteousness” (Romans 6:12-16).

1. Why can't you successfully serve God and follow the devil at the same time?

2. What are the advantages of being an obedient slave of Jesus Christ?

3. Judging by how you’ve lived your life in the last week, whose slave are you?

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WEEK SIX

FORGIVENESS

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Sin Removal

Do you live as if you are completely forgiven? Or do you let the devil whisper

things to you like, “You can't expect to live a holy life because a person with a past

like yours will never be able to reform,” or, “What you’ve done is so terrible that

God will never be able to forgive you,” or, “You're ruined for life. God can't do

anything with a mess like you”?

Don’t ever listen to those lies. God says He forgives your confessed sin and

won't even remember it again. He doesn’t just put all the smutty contents of your sin

in an envelope so you look perfectly good on the outside. He removes your sin and

actually makes you pure and righteous.

Moses didn’t run around, saying, “But I killed a man in Egypt, so there’s no

way that God can use me.” Moses knew how to accept God's forgiveness, to live

close to God, and to let God do miraculous things through him.

Peter didn’t keep reminding himself that he had denied Jesus at the time when

Jesus needed him most. Peter lived like a forgiven man, and that made all the

difference. With forgiveness comes God's love, joy, and power to defeat sin. Of

course, the earthly consequences of sin will still be around – the murdered man will

still be dead, the murderer will still be in jail, the illegitimate child will keep asking

questions, and the person you’ve hurt deeply may not forgive you. But God in His

wisdom and mercy can work His miracles in all of this – if you let Him. A former

murderer who lives like a forgiven man, displaying real joy and peace, even in jail,

may be one of God's best advertisements. Give God a chance with your life.

“For I will be merciful toward their iniquities, and I will remember their sins

no more” (Hebrews 8:12).

“As far as the east is from the west, so far does he remove our transgressions

from us” (Psalm 103:12).

“He will again have compassion upon us, He will tread our iniquities under

foot. Thou wilt cast all our sins into the depths of the sea” (Micah 7:19).

1. List the figures of speech, or examples, used to explain what God does to our sins

when He forgives them.

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2. How does God feel toward a person who comes to Him for forgiveness?

3. Think back on any sins you've committed in the last week. Confess them to the

Lord, and then imagine them being buried in the darkest, deepest ocean bottom.

(Micah 7: 19).

Perfectly Clean

If I were sending a five-year-old girl out to play in a yard still filled with

puddles from last night’s rain, I’d give her clear instructions: “Now don’t play in the

mud and don’t get your teddy bear dirty.” If she were an ordinary five-year-old,

she’d probably come back into the house covered in mud, and crying, “I'm really

sorry. I didn’t mean to do it. Please don’t spank me.”

I could reply, “That’s okay, dear. I accept you and forgive you just the way

you are.” But forgiving her wouldn’t be enough. She would still be a mess. Because

she was already so dirty, she’d have no reason to stop playing in the mud. And there

are lots of things that a clean girl can do that a muddy girl cannot do – a clean girl

would be allowed to go many places where a muddy girl would not be accepted.

Actually, my scrubbing that little girl and giving her clean clothes would make a

change in her. She would act differently once she was clean.

God not only forgives our sin but He also “cleanses us from all

unrighteousness.” He cleans us up completely. This is not something we can do for

ourselves, but we do have a part. The five-year-old cannot do an adequate job of

washing herself and providing herself with clean clothes. However, she must

cooperate with the person who is bathing her and giving her a fresh change of

clothes. Let God cleanse you form the inside out and make you a new and a clean

person. The more you long for a clean, pure life, the deeper His cleansing will be.

“If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just, and will forgive us our sins and

cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9).

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“How much more shall the blood of Christ, who through the eternal Spirit

offered himself without blemish to God, purify your conscience from dead works

to serve the living God” (Hebrews 9:14).

“In a great house there are not only vessels of gold and silver but also of wood

and earthenware, and some for noble use, some for ignoble. If anyone purifies

himself from what is ignoble, then he will be a vessel for noble use, consecrated

and useful to the master of the house, ready for any good work. So shun youthful

passions and aim at righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who

call upon God from a pure heart” (2 Timothy 2:20-22).

1. What is the thing that purifies our consciences?

2. God cleanses us for a purpose. What is that purpose?

3. It is the blood of Jesus that cleans us up, but we have the responsibility of

cooperating with Him. What specific things are we told to do?

How Many Times Is Seventy-Times-Seven?

“I don’t think I can ever forgive him.” Have you ever said or thought that? If

you have, you are on dangerous ground. The verses that come just after the Lord’s

Prayer in the Sermon on the Mount are not recited by church congregations, or used

often as sermon texts, but they are just as much a part of the Bible.

“For if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly Father also will

forgive you; but if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your

Father forgive your trespasses” (Matthew 6:14-15).

If you are a Christian, you must forgive. When Jesus, the perfect Son of God,

forgave you for everything you’ve ever done, how can you not forgive another

person – no matter what he has done? Your emotions may not be completely under

your control, but if, by an act of your will, you choose to forgive, your feelings will

sooner or later come into line.

God cannot forgive you if you refuse to forgive others. The Christian with an

unforgiving attitude walks straight into trouble – God won't let His children get by

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with unforgiving attitudes. Peter thought he was being very generous if he forgave a

person for the same offense seven times. How many times has God forgiven you?

“Then Peter came up and said to him, ‘Lord, how often shall my brother sin

against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do

not say to you seven times, but seventy times seven.’ … then his lord summoned

him and said to him, ‘You wicked servant! I forgave you all that debt because

you besought me; and should not you have had mercy on your fellow servant, as I

had mercy on you? And in anger his lord delivered him to the jailers, till he

should pay all his debt. So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you,

if you do not forgive your brother from your heart” (Matthew 18:21, 22, 32-35).

1. What should you do if someone wrongs you and is unwilling even to apologize?

2. What kind of forgiveness does God expect us to give?

3. How will God deal with us if we refuse to forgive?

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Are You Forgiving Yourself?

When I was young, my cousin came one day to play with my sister and me. In

her excitement, my sister told him about the bedroom slippers with bunnies on them

that he would be receiving for Christmas. Suddenly remembering that this was a

secret, she said, “Forget that I ever told you.”

The next time we visited my cousin’s home, he assured my sister, “I forgot all

about the slippers with bunnies on them that you're going to give me for Christmas.”

Is your attitude toward God's forgiveness of your confessed sin influenced by

similar experiences you’ve had with people? Do you really believe that God means

it when He says that He will forgive all your sin? He does mean it. Confess your sin

with compete trust that God will destroy it in the fire of His holiness.

Some people say, “Well, I know that God forgives me, but I can't forgive

myself.” Since when have you been in the business of forgiving your own sins?

Only the extreme pride of putting yourself above God could make you think you're

responsible for forgiving your own sins. God says He’ll not only forgive your sin,

but He’ll forget it. Not taking God at His word is unbelief. Accept His forgiveness.

“I, I am He who blots out your transgressions for my own sake, and I will not

remember your sins” (Isaiah 43:25).

“I thank him who has given me strength for this, Christ Jesus our Lord,

because he judged me faithful by appointing me to His service, though I formerly

blasphemed and persecuted and insulted him; but I received mercy because I had

acted ignorantly in unbelief, and the grace of our Lord overflowed for me with

the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. The saying is sure and worthy of full

acceptance, that Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners. And I am the

foremost of sinners” (1 Timothy 1:12-15).

1. What kinds of sins had Paul committed?

2. What things had Jesus done for Paul?

3. How can God's willingness to forgive Paul encourage you?

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Forgiven Sinners, Inc.

I wish I could have seen Jesus heal a blind man, or raise Lazarus from the

dead. Yet, the miracle of Jesus’ forgiving and changing the repentant sinner outranks

all others. David committed both adultery and murder, but because of his full and

sincere confession, he received forgiveness, and God was able to use him to rule His

people and write part of the Bible.

As a boy St. Augustine had taken part in a theft, and as a young man he had

lived with his girlfriend, an arrangement acceptable to most of Roman society. After

he became a Christian, Augustine lived a holy life that others admired, and he

became a brilliant writer and church leader. When he was dying, he asked that Psalm

32 be printed in large letters and hung above his bed so he could read the words and

meditate on them. The Psalm begins:

“Blessed is he whose transgressions are forgiven, whose sin is covered”

(Psalm 32:1).

It’s easy to forget that Jesus taught that visible sins are a result of wrong

thinking, and that we are responsible for our thoughts as well as our actions.

Therefore, we tend to think that only ex-cons have experienced great forgiveness.

But if a film were made of your thought life, would it be an X-rated movie? All of us

need mountains of God's forgiveness. Forgiven sinners are amazing miracles. If

you're not one of the group, join ‘em!

“Then turning toward the woman he said to Simon, ‘Do you see this woman?

I entered your house, you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet

with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You gave me no kiss, but from the

time I came in she has not ceased to kiss my feet. You did not anoint my head

with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. Therefore I tell you, her

sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much; but he who is forgiven

little, loves little” (Luke 7:44-47).

1. If you have been forgiven of little, is it because you haven’t sinned much, or

because you haven’t bothered to confess the sins you have committed?

2. Why will the truly forgiven person love Jesus so much?

3. What are some of the blessings of forgiveness?

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No Unfinished Projects

Some of my Christian friends wear buttons that say, “Please be patient, God is

not finished with me yet.” It’s wonderful to know that God doesn’t just forgive us

and then leave us alone. Also, He won't suddenly abandon us to work on more

promising Christians. The work that God began in you the day you accepted Christ

as your Savior, He continues every day of your life and will one day complete in

heaven.

God wants to care for everything in your life – temporal or spiritual – because

it will affect you for eternity. He will silently continue working in you every

moment. All this will happen on one condition – that you trust Him. Absolute trust

in God has been the key factor in the lives of people God has mightily used. They

weren’t the most talented people. Often they didn’t possess great charm and wit.

They even made mistakes that some other Christians would not have made. But,

through it all they trusted God to work in them, and God fulfilled His purposes in

their lives.

The devil wants to prevent the work of God in your life, and he has some very

sneaky ways of doing it. He tries to convince you that it’s humble to say or think,

“I'm such a poor Christian, I could never work for God,” or, “Other people can pray,

or witness, or lead a Bible study so much better, so I'll let them do it.” or, “I've had

such a bad background so the devil especially picks on me. I don’t have much

chance to grow as a Christian.” These are not humble confessions. They are insults

to God who can do the impossible. He is waiting for you to trust Him enough to take

your hands off and let Him work in your life.

“The Lord will fulfill his purpose for me” (Psalm 138:8).

“For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord, plans for welfare and not

for evil, to give you a future and a hope” (Jeremiah 29:11).

“And I am sure that He who began a good work in you will bring it to

completion at the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6).

1. Who will take the responsibility for making sure you develop into a mature

Christian?

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2. What is your part in all this?

3. Why shouldn’t you allow “bad” circumstances to get you down?

God Even Used Peter’s Big Mouth

A lot of teenagers could identify with the Apostle Peter. He was a jump-in-

before-you-think loudmouth who couldn’t be depended on. He loved to let people

know he was around and wanted to be an authority on topics about which he knew

very little. Peter was born with some great natural abilities and characteristics, but

his wrong motives made them completely useless to Jesus.

People must have wondered what Jesus saw in him, but He loved Peter and

forgave him. Peter accepted this forgiveness and gave his life to Jesus. When Jesus

put the right motives within Peter, his willingness to jump into anything became

courage, his love for talking was transformed into ability to preach – and God made

him dependable. Everyone else would have laughed if Jesus had predicted the great

things Peter would do.

Jesus never gave up on Peter; He saw his potential. Jesus sees what you can be

and He won't give up on you – trust Him. If you fail, it’s not because you are ugly,

or have an offensive personality, or are stupid, or have horrible parents. It’s because

you didn’t let Jesus give you His motives and you didn’t expect miracles in your life.

In order to receive Jesus’ motives, you must confess your sin and yield to His

correction. Then accept His forgiveness and wait in faith to see what God can do

with your big mouth or your poor study habits.

“Simon, Simon behold, Satan demanded to have you, that he might sift you

like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail; and when you

have turned again, strengthen your brethren” (Luke 22:31, 32).

“But Peter, standing with the eleven, lifted up his voice and addressed the,

‘Men of Judea and all who dwell in Jerusalem, let this be known to you, and give

ear to my words … Let all the house of Israel therefore know assuredly that God

has made him both Lord and Christ, this Jesus whom you crucified.’ Now when

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they heard this they were cut to the heart, and said to Peter and the rest of the

apostles, ‘Brethren, what shall we do?’ And Peter said to them, ‘Repent, and be

baptized every one of you in the name of Jesus Christ for the forgiveness of your

sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit” (Acts 2:14, 36-38).

1. Why did the sermon Peter preached on the day of Pentecost take a lot of courage?

2. Where did Peter receive the ability and the fearlessness he displayed that day?

3. Is there a situation you must soon face that demands more ability and courage

than you already have? What should you do about it?

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WEEK SEVEN

QUIT SINNING AND

START WINNING

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Do You Send Invitations to Temptation?

A little boy who lived near a lake was instructed by his father to never go

swimming without supervision. One day his father caught him swimming. Soon the

innocent-sounding little guy was saying, “But, Daddy, I didn’t mean to go

swimming. It just happened.”

“Then,” replied his father, “why did you take your swimsuit with you when

you came to play near the lake?”

The little boy answered, “I took it along just in case I got tempted.”

Are you that little boy? Do you devise plans that will make it harder for you to

obey Jesus’ commands, even thou you say you love Him? Instead of providing

yourself with the possibility for sinning, give yourself every opportunity to do right.

If the little boy had worn his new watch and left his swimsuit at home, the day

would have ended differently.

Take Jesus with you through the day and think, “How would He plan for this

situation?” Jesus wouldn't even consider lying his way out of an uncomfortable

situation. Realizing this, honestly face the problem at hand. You know that Jesus

would have you plan a date carefully to avoid situations in which temptation could

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become strong. Jesus would study for the test instead of trying to pick up some

answers at lunch from a friend who took the test second hour.

If you give yourself to Jesus, He’ll show you how to organize your life so that

obeying God's commandments will be easier.

“But put on the Lord Jesus Christ, and make no provision for the flesh, to

gratify (fulfill) its desires” (Romans 13:14).

“And after a time his master’s wife cast her eyes upon Joseph, and said, ‘Lie

with me.’ But he refused and said to his master’s wife, ‘…How then can I do this

great wickedness, and sin against God?’ And although she spoke to Joseph day

after day, he would not listen to her, to lie with her or to be with her. But one day,

when he went into the house to do his work and none of the men of the house was

there in the house, she caught him by his garment, saying, ‘Lie with me.’ But he

left his garment in her hand, and fled and got out of the house” (Genesis 39:7-

12).

1. What was Joseph’s answer to Mrs. Potiphar the first time she asked him to go to

bed with her?

2. What measures did Joseph take to avoid temptation?

3. What ways can you think of to avoid especially difficult temptations?

Choosing Right

If for some strange reason I wanted to rid America of Coca Cola, it would be

ridiculous for me to start by defacing every Coca Cola sign I could find. Even

smashing Coke bottles and burying Coke cans wouldn’t be very effective. I’d have

to demolish every factory and destroy every recipe to effectively do the job.

When it comes to fighting sin, man tries to overcome sin by bits and pieces –

smashing Coke bottles if you will – without dealing with the source. The blood of

Jesus takes away sins, but the cross has also dealt with the sinful self that is the

source of sin. In your own strength, you can't die to sin and live to righteousness.

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You must give yourself completely to God so that His power within you can make

you strong against temptation too strong for you, and He will always provide a way

of escape.

Have this attitude: My eyes belong to Jesus and therefore it’s impossible for

them to look at an X-rated movie; my mouth belongs to Jesus who wouldn’t think of

spreading this gossip; my hands belong to Jesus so they’ll be glad to do the dishes

because my mother looks tired tonight. This isn’t just the power of positive thinking.

Only God can work like this in your life. Memorize one of the Scripture verses for

today and keep asking God to show you what it means for your life.

“He himself bore our sins in his body on the tree, that we might die to sin and

live to righteousness” (1 Peter 2:24).

“Put off your old nature which belongs to your former manner of life which is

corrupt through deceitful lusts, and be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and

put on the new nature, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and

holiness” (Ephesians 4:22-24).

1. What are we to take off in the same way we take off dirty clothes? Remember

that throwing away the old sinful you isn’t enough – you must replace it with

something better. You must constantly expose your mind to God's truth and let

that rule you rather than the world’s thinking.

2. After taking off the “dirty clothes” of our sin, what are we to put on?

3. Peter writes that we can “die to sin.” What are some characteristics of being

dead?

Right and Wrong

When God gives us commands, He gives us the power to obey. He wants us to

have victory over sin. A lot of our frustration comes because we are confused about

what sin really is, and how we can overcome it. God doesn’t command us to look

sharp at all times, appear successful, never be clumsy, and always please everyone.

God does command us to “Honor your father and mother,” “Be still and know that I

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am God,” “Trust in the Lord with all your heart,” and “If possible, so far as it

depends on you, live peaceably with all.”

Victory involves moment-by-moment decisions to apologize to your mother,

to concentrate on God's power rather than on the unfair decision, to determine to

trust God for the money you need to attend camp, and to be a good worker for the

crabby boss. Maintaining an image of a person who never makes mistakes has

nothing to do with victory over sin.

Also understand that there is a big difference between willfully disobeying

God and unconsciously sinning. In fact, many people define sin as “willful

disobedience to God.” Every person who has taken care of little children knows the

difference between a child purposely disobeying a specific command such as, “You

must not play in the sandbox with your good clothes on,” and a child in his

excitement forgetting that the cement is wet and cannot be walked on. Our

humanness may prevent us from doing all God wishes; but if we set our wills toward

obeying Him, He will always give us the power to obey His specific commands.

That power to obey comes from God who has all power.

“No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful,

and he will not let you be tempted beyond your strength, but with the temptation

will also provide the way of escape that you may be able to endure it” (1

Corinthians 10:13).

“But now put them all away; anger, wrath, malice, slander, and foul talk from

your mouth. Do not lie to one another, seeing that you have put off the old nature

with its practices and have put on the new nature, which is being renewed in

knowledge after the image of its creator. Put on then, as God's chosen ones, holy

and beloved, compassion, kindness, lowliness, meekness, and patience,

forbearing one another, and if one has a complaint against another, forgiving each

other; as the Lord has forgiven you, so you also must forgive. And above all

these put on love, which binds everything together in perfect harmony”

(Colossians 3:8-10, 12-14).

1. What are we told to do with sinful practices and thoughts?

2. List the things that Christians are specifically told to put on and wear. Are these

part of your “wardrobe”?

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That Selfishness Inside Me

The basic problem is, “How do I get rid of the selfish me that wants its own

way and gets into arguments with God?” God has provided a way. Paul writes: “But

far be it from me to glory except in the cross of our Lord Jesus Christ, by which the

world has been crucified to me, and I to the world” (Galatians 6:14).

Crucifixion means death. Since we have proven ourselves to be sinners, there

is no way for that sinful self to be eradicated unless it dies. The miracle of the cross

is that not only did Jesus shed His blood to take away our sins, but that sinful self

within us was crucified when Jesus died. When Paul says, “I have been crucified

with Christ,” he means exactly that.

Just as Jesus’ blood doesn’t cleanse your sin unless you have faith in that fact

and ask for forgiveness, so too, the death of your old sinful self becomes real in you

only if you allow it to. A cruel slave master wouldn’t be able to make a dead slave

do anything – no matter how viciously he tortured him. Sin, like that cruel master, is

always trying to enslave you. But by giving up your right to have your own way, and

surrendering totally to Jesus, you can by faith make the miracle of the cross – “by

which the world has been crucified to me and I to the world” – real in your life.

If I give up my right to have everyone think my piano solo was the highlight

of the evening, and have faith that God can work in my life through every situation, I

don’t have to be angry because my number is omitted from the program. The selfish

me is dead, and circumstances don’t have to cause me to sin.

Know that Jesus took your old self with Him to the cross. Give your will to God.

Believe that God can do in you what you can't do yourself.

“Truly, truly, I say to you, unless a grain of wheat falls into the earth and dies,

it remains alone, but if it dies, it bears much fruit. He who loves his life will lose

it, and he who hates his life in this world will keep it for eternal life. If anyone

serves me, he must follow me – and where I am, there shall my servant be also; if

anyone serves me, the Father will honor him” (John 12:24-26).

1. What excuses could a grain of wheat have for not being buried in the ground?

2. What excuses do you have for not giving yourself totally to God?

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Caterpillars Can Change

Do you ever feel like you're caught in quicksand, a slimy bog, a bottomless pit

– a situation you don’t think you'll ever be able to get out of? Well, the Bible calls

this kind of vicious circle the law of sin and death. There are basically two laws –

the law of the Spirit of life in Christ, and the law of sin and death. There is our

selfish nature with its inability to obey and love God, and there is God's nature that

loves freely and sets us free from the power of our old nature.

How can one get free from the law of sin and death? Caterpillars have a pretty

rough time getting through mud without being soiled by it. Let’s say that the mud is

sin. Mud is everywhere and it seems impossible to avoid. The caterpillar can't rise

above the mud either – unless it can get rid of its caterpillar self. This, of course, can

happen if the caterpillar’s old self is discarded and the creature becomes a beautiful

butterfly.

Now if the caterpillar had a choice in this matter and could say, “I want to

remain a caterpillar because I like the mud and it’s just caterpillar nature to like

mud,” there would be no victory and no flying above the mud. You are faced with

the same choice: you can choose to live by God's law and become a butterfly, or you

can live by the law of sin and death and crawl like a caterpillar.

“For the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus has set me free from the law of

sin and death” (Romans 8:2).

“For those who live according to the flesh set their minds on the things of the

flesh, but those who live according to the Spirit set their minds on the things of

the Spirit. To set the mind on the flesh is death, but to set the mind on the Spirit is

life and peace. For the mind that is set on the flesh is hostile to God; it does not

submit to God's law, indeed it cannot; and those who are in the flesh cannot

please God. But you are not in the flesh, you are in the Spirit, if in fact the Spirit

of God dwells in you. Anyone who does not have the Spirit of Christ does not

belong to him” (Romans 8:5-9).

1. What does it mean to “set the mind” on something?

2. How can you set your mind on the Spirit?

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3. What problem in your life will require setting your mind on the Spirit if the

problem is going to be solved?

Faith and Sin Can't Sit on the Same Bench

One definition of faith goes like this: “Faith is my acceptance of God's fact.”

The devil is always trying to get you to doubt truth. But your disbelief of a fact

doesn’t make the fact false, it simply becomes inoperative in your life. It is just as

possible to walk across a plank that connects the roofs of two five-story buildings as

it is to cross one laid on the ground. However, lack of belief in that fact, and fear

based on lack of faith, will keep one from doing so.

One important Bible fact is, “No one born of God commits sin; for God's

nature abides in him, and he cannot sin because he is born of God” (1 John 3:9).

Watchman Nee explains, “John is not telling us that sin is now no longer in our

history and that we shall not again commit sin. He is saying that to sin is not in the

nature of that which is born of God.” In nature wood floats, but in history it is

possible for wood to sink if it is enclosed in metal or if it is nailed to a dock that is

under water.

Now I have a choice. Will I live by God's fact – “Whatsoever is born of God

cannot sin,” or by what my experience seems to show? If I were blind, I couldn't see

a sunset, and if I were deaf, I couldn’t enjoy a concert. Yet, the elegance of the

colors and the beauty of the music would still exist even if I couldn't make them part

of my experience. The piece of wood encased in metal may stay in the bottom of a

lake until it rots not knowing its nature is to float. Even so, the devil may deceive

you into thinking there is no deliverance from the power of sin. If you don’t believe

“no one born of God commits sin,” you live as though that page of your Bible didn’t

exist.

Fact, Faith, and Experience were walking along the top of a wall. As long as

Faith followed Fact, everything was fine. But when Faith looked back to see how

Experience was doing, he nearly fell off. Put your faith in God's facts, not in your

experience or feelings.

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“By this we know that we love the children of God, when we love God and

obey his commandments. For this is the love of God, that we keep his

commandments. And his commandments are not burdensome. For, whatever is

born of God overcomes the world, and this is the victory that overcomes the

world, our faith. Who is it that overcomes the world but he who believes that

Jesus is the Son of God?” (1 John 5:2-5).

1. What is automatically expected of people who love God?

2. What is necessary if we are to overcome the world and have victory?

3. Why is belief that Jesus is the Son of God crucial to victory in your life?

But You Could Fly

The Bible talks about two kinds of life – the life of the spirit and the life of the

flesh – natural life. We’re living in a world where the things around us are running

according to natural life – the life of the flesh. It’s a world in which people are

expected to stomp on others to get to the top, to tell a lie when a lot is at stake, and

to boast about how great they are.

When you become a Christian and start reading the Bible, you learn about

selflessness, truth, and humility. The person who uses the resources available in

natural life to try to turn the other cheek and love his enemies will give up in

frustration. But God has given His children Spirit life, and Spirit life can do what

natural life – the life of the flesh – can never accomplish. For example, the law of

gravity governs our earth. Whether I throw an algebra book out the window on the

eighty-seventh floor (wouldn’t you like to sometimes?) or merely drop a pencil,

gravity will take over. However, there are other physical laws. Looking up in the

sky, you'll have to admit that neither birds nor airplanes seem to worry about the law

of gravity. They fly according to a higher law.

If science fiction writers concocted a power that enabled individuals to fly

three hundred miles per hour and land safely, just by carrying a pocket-sized device,

readers would be amazed if this power were never used. Obviously, the person who

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has never accepted Christ in the first place doesn’t have the life of the Spirit to give

them power. However, there are Christians who never use the supernatural Spirit-

power they possess. If we try to follow God's rules in our own strength, we are

doomed to failure. The devil knows this and is always trying to make us depend on

our own strength. If you rely on the supernatural life of Jesus’ Spirit, you'll be flying

above temptations to sin, but if you trust yourself, you're bound to crash.

“Not by might, nor by power, but by my Spirit, says the Lord of hosts”

(Zechariah 4:6).

“But if Christ is in you, although your bodies are dead because of sin, your

spirits are alive because of righteousness. If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus

from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will give

life to your mortal bodies also through his Spirit which dwells in you. So then,

brethren, we are debtors, not to the flesh, to live according to the flesh – for if

you live according to the flesh you will die, but if by the Spirit you put to death

the deeds of the body you will live. For all who are led by the Spirit of God are

sons of God” (Romans 8:10-14).

1. What great thing did the Holy Spirit do in history? (Romans 8:11)

2. What is the difference between meeting temptation in our own power and in the

power of the Holy Spirit?

3. What problem in your life have you been trying to solve with your own power?

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WEEK EIGHT

ME, MYSELF, AND I

– YOUR SELF - IMAGE

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Who Am I Anyway?

You came to God as a dirty, rotten sinner whose righteousness is no better

than filthy rags, unable to save yourself. Then how do you square that with the fact

that God created you to be something special and that you should accept yourself?

You really can thank God that you have knobby knees, red hair and freckles, and at

the same time confess to Him that your motives are selfish and need to be changed

by Him – if you're willing to accept God's definition of who you are.

My car is a good little car – it runs well, doesn’t have any big dents, and

requires very little repair. However, one Sunday morning there was an incredibly

heavy rainfall that turned every low area in the city into a lake. When my car came

to the waist-deep water under a railroad bridge, it was totally helpless, as were all the

other cars. One driver thought his car should be able to double as a boat and went

full speed into that deep water. Of course, his car stopped and nearly drowned!

What if that poor car, nearly covered by water, began thinking, “I'm a total

failure because here I am in all this water and I can't do a thing. I'm awful.”? We’d

think it was pretty dumb for a car to be depressed because it couldn’t function as a

boat. Now the Bible teaches that Jesus has to enter our lives and change us from the

inside out. When you get discouraged because you are not naturally good, you are

like the car trying to be a boat. Just as the car could be thankful that it was a compact

that saved on gas, that it was painted red, and that it had a vinyl interior, so you

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should be thankful for the way God made you – for the unique qualities you have

and for the special ways you can be of service to God.

You are important to God and He loves you very much. That’s why He sent

Jesus to save you. But your natural “goodness” does not impress God, and you can't

save yourself. Even after you become a Christian, you can't live the Christian life in

your own strength.

“We have all become like one who is unclean, and all our righteous deeds are

like a polluted garment” (Isaiah 64:6).

“I have loved you with an everlasting love; therefore I have continued my

faithfulness to you” (Jeremiah 31:3).

“For I know that nothing good dwells within me” (Romans 7:18).

“But by the grace of God I am what I am” (1 Corinthians 15:10).

1. As God looks at you, what characteristics – good and bad – does He see?

2. If you were God, able to see into the corners of everyone’s life, would you love

you?

3. Describe the kind of love God has for you.

God Loves You – Pimples and All

If you possessed the power to change anything about the way you look, would

you use that power? Would you like to have a shorter nose, thinner legs, fewer

freckles, or smaller feet? Most people would answer “yes” to this question, but in

answering “yes” they are forgetting some important things. Why does almost every

person wish to be cast in the beauty queen or the Mr. America mold? It’s only

because right now that is the world’s definition of “beautiful” or “handsome.”

However, popular standards of beauty change; a woman with a tan was once

considered ugly, and the somewhat hefty Statue of Liberty was once considered the

ideal feminine form!

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God wants you to accept His definition of “beautiful,” and He wants to make

you beautiful from the inside out. God made you just the way you are so you could

best reflect His beauty. A problem with wanting to remake yourself is that you're

actually telling God that He did a bad job when He created you. You don’t like it

when people tell you your painting or cake is the worst they’ve ever seen; the Master

Designer of the Universe doesn’t exactly appreciate nasty comments from you

either.

You'll enjoy a great sense of relaxation and peace when you accept yourself

the way God made you. After you have done this, ask God what things you can do to

look your best. A diet, more exercise, or a change of hairstyle may be in God’s plan

for you. Accepting the way God made you, and thanking Him for it, will save you

from one of two extremes: not caring about your appearance because you think

you're so ugly it won't help, or spending too much time and money trying to look

acceptable.

“For thou didst form my inward parts, thou didst knit me together in my

mother’s womb. I praise thee, for thou art fearful and wonderful. Wonderful are

thy works. Thou knowest me right well; my frame was not hidden from thee,

when I was being made in secret, intricately wrought in the depths of the earth.

Thy eyes beheld my unformed substance; in thy book were written every one of

them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them”

(Psalm 139:13-16).

“He has made everything beautiful” (Ecclesiastes 3:11).

1. Each of us can say the things that David said in Psalm 139. What things did God

plan for you before you were born?

2. Why did the Psalmist thank God for the way he was made?

3. Have you thanked God for making you just the way you are?

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Self-Image

Do you ever feel worthless? Do zits, greasy hair, and a lack of poise get you

down? Do you dwell on the fact that you are uncoordinated or a poor student, or are

not particularly popular? You need this very old truth from the Bible: “For the Lord

sees not as man sees; man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on

the heart” (1 Samuel 16:7).

Getting out of the low self-image syndrome involves deciding who is

important to you and who is going to shape your image of yourself. If you let society

do it, you will always come out a loser because no one can be good-looking, witty,

successful, intelligent, athletic, musical, and well-informed, all at the same time.

Every other TV commercial warns that you are lacking in some way. You could let

your friends shape your self-image, but conforming to the crowd has its dangers.

Besides, your friends could let you down.

You may think you would feel good about yourself if you fell in love and a

special person would believe in you. However, married people usually seem just as

insecure as those who are single, and lovers often turn into people who compete with

each other and tear each other down. Some of you don't even look for acceptance in

your family, though others can see that your family seems to love you most when

you're simply doing what is expected of you.

If you decide that God is going to be so important in your life that nothing else

matters, you'll sense God loving you and comforting you when no one else

understands. That God who made the universe, controls the galaxies, and presides

over history loves you – warts and all – with a constant love. In the light of this great

fact, should what other people think of you be that important? If God is really first in

your life, the opinions of others will never ruin your self-image.

“Nevertheless, I am continually with thee; thou dost hold my right hand. Thou

dost guide me with thy counsel, and afterward thou wilt receive me to glory.

Whom have I in heaven but thee? And there is nothing upon earth that I desire

besides thee. My flesh and my portion forever” (Psalm 73:23-26).

1. On a scale of one to ten, how would the writer of this Psalm rate God?

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2. How can God's nearness and His importance make the difference next time you

make a fool of yourself in front of the most popular kids in school?

3. Do you spend more time being concerned about the inside of you that God sees,

or the outside that others see?

Self-Consciousness

One definition of self-consciousness is “thinking about yourself.” How much

time do you waste worrying about how you look, wondering if others have a good

impression of you, or trying to analyze why your feelings are hurt. Self-

consciousness can keep a talented pianist from ever performing in front of a group,

prevent a guy from giving a word of encouragement or affection, or stop someone

from learning to ski. Every time we start thinking only about ourselves we spend

time in self-pity, which can only hurt us.

You may agree that self-consciousness is bad and that you'd love to forget

about how you look to others; you really want to ignore ridicule, and you would like

to try new things that you may not be able to do well. The question you have is,

“How can I live above self-consciousness?”

There’s a man in the Bible who had self-consciousness licked. Sure, some

people made fun of him. After all, camel’s hair T-shirts weren’t high fashion, and

the Roman emperor didn’t eat locusts and wild honey for breakfast. Living in the

desert wasn’t the thing to do either. But John the Baptist had something, and his

preaching was worth listening to – even worth going out to the desert to hear. The

fact that he was losing all his disciples to Jesus didn’t bother him either. He had

learned to replace self-consciousness with Christ-consciousness.

It is possible to really concentrate on two things at once. If you are only aware

of serving Christ and living for Him, self-consciousness will disappear. John the

Baptist thought so much of Jesus that he described Him as One “the thong of whose

sandal I am not worthy to untie.”

When self-consciousness comes to haunt you, always ask the question,

“Whom am I living for anyway – God or myself?”

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“Then I said, ‘Ah, Lord God! Behold, I do not know how to speak, for I am

only a youth.’ But the Lord said to me, ‘Do not say, “I am only a youth”; for to

all to whom I send you you shall go, and whatever I command you you shall

speak. Be not afraid of them, for I am with you to deliver you. … But you, gird

up your loins; arise, and say to them everything that I command you. Do not be

dismayed by them, lest I dismay you before them’” (Jeremiah 1:6-8, 17).

“He must increase but I must decrease” (John 3:30).

1. What does God say about Jeremiah’s self-conscious attitude?

2. In light of God's advice to Jeremiah in verse 17, what would you tell a Christian

friend of yours who is scared to death to give a report in tomorrow’s English

class?

Lions, Losers, and Lessons

Paul’s situation in Rome was “the pits” – and then some. He was in prison and

his only “crime” was preaching the good news of Jesus Christ. Almost all of his

friends had deserted him, and at his trial no one defended him. Even though he had

not been fed to the lions this time, a shortage of criminals to execute at the next

Colosseum show could affect the outcome of a future court hearing. He didn’t even

have his coat and his books.

Most people in a situation like this would have written, “Everything I've ever

lived for is gone. I'm a miserable failure and there is no one to cheer me up.” Instead,

Paul wrote that he had fought a good fight, he had kept the faith, and he was praising

the Lord. Paul knew that success was obeying God, regardless of how things turn

out.

A lot of frustration comes from your deciding you're a failure because you

didn’t measure up to your own goals or the expectations someone else made for you.

How about learning a lesson from Paul? How about measuring success and failure

by God's standards? If you are disobeying God, you may look very successful but

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you are still a failure. If you are wholeheartedly obeying God, you are a success –

even if all your report card grades are below C level.

“For I am already on the point of being sacrificed; the time of my departure

has come. I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the

faith. Henceforth, there is laid up for me the crown of righteousness, which the

Lord, the righteous judge, will award to me on that Day, and not only to me but

also to all who have loved his appearing” (2 Timothy 4:6-8).

“The Lord will rescue me from every evil and save me for his heavenly

kingdom. To Him be the glory forever and ever” (2 Timothy 4:18).

1. Why was Paul not discouraged?

2. List statements that prove that Paul was not worried about being a failure or

being executed.

3. Paul viewed the Christian life as a “fight” and a “race.” How do you view the

Christian life?

The Right Frame for the Picture

Once you decide to let Jesus be the Lord of your life, you can develop a

strategy for coping with feelings of inadequacy and inferiority. The most important

consideration is what Jesus thinks and what He wants. That makes you like a picture

frame; the beautiful and valuable painting is Jesus within you.

People don’t go to art galleries to admire frames. However, it is important that

the frame blends with the picture to complement its beauty. God had a plan for you

before you were born. Your looks and your personality were especially designed to

complement the life of Jesus within you. To the person who puts Jesus first, there is

no higher purpose than displaying Jesus. If someone says of you, “If a person like

that can be a Christian, I can too,” your whole life will be worthwhile.

But how does this relate to feeling like an idiot because you struck out again,

or feeling self-conscious because everyone else dressed up and you didn’t? If Jesus

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is first in your life, these other things will not be important enough to ruin your day.

Constantly carry on a little conversation with Jesus, saying things like, “Well, Lord,

if you think I look great, that’s good enough for me”; or, “Lord, now that everyone

is mad at me for causing the team to lose, I know more about the rejection you faced

on earth”; or, “Lord, help me find a person who is hurting on the inside, so I can

help that person rather than thinking about my wearing the wrong thing.”

Of course, there’s nothing especially spiritual about being a bad baseball

player or dressing out of place; but how we look or perform is not terribly important.

God's “picture frames” should certainly pray about their appearance and the

impression they make, but should always remember: “Therefore I tell you, do not be

anxious about your life, what you shall eat or what you shall drink, nor about your

body, what you shall put on” (Matthew 6:25).

“All thy works shall give thanks to thee, O Lord, and all thy saints shall bless

thee! They shall speak of the glory of thy kingdom and tell of thy power, to make

known to the sons of men thy mighty deeds, and the glorious splendor of thy

kingdom” (Psalm 145:10-12).

“And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the

Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him” (Colossians 3:17).

1. In the above verses, what is God commanding you to do?

2. How does doing everything for God's glory help to defeat feelings of inferiority?

3. If you play baseball to bring honor to Jesus, He will understand perfectly if you

strike out – it’s not a big deal. If you dress to please Jesus, the pressure to look

better than everyone else will be gone and you can relax and be yourself. Are you

strained and frustrated in some area of your life because you're too concerned

about pleasing people?

You Make a Perfect You

Marching with the high school band in a big parade can be exciting and

enjoyable – unless you're in the front row marching out of step and you're wearing

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the last available hat, which would have fit Humpty Dumpty, but which won't stay

on your head even though it’s stuffed with two newspapers. Well, it happened to me

when I had moved to a new high school. After one practice, I was stuck in a parade.

The tuba player kept retrieving my hat and I marched out of step for a mile-and-a-

half. I cried all the way home because I thought I had ruined the whole parade. I

never even suspected the glaring pride involved in my self-evaluation.

We don’t recognize that it’s pride that makes us so afraid of making fools out

of ourselves. It’s pride that wants everyone to think I'm graceful, smooth, and cool,

and that’s why I nearly die when I mess up on making an introduction. It’s because

of pride that you want everyone to recognize your great intelligence, and that’s why

you're crushed when you say something dumb and everyone laughs. It’s pride that

keeps you in front of the mirror for an hour a day, and makes your world cave in

when you get a bad haircut.

Pride can easily become your jailer. Pride rattles his chains when you have to

give an oral report in science, when you feel only the most expensive clothes would

make you look acceptable, or when you don’t want anyone to see you play tennis.

Pride demands that you be Superman or Wonder Woman. Confess your pride as sin

and come into the freedom Jesus wants to give you. The truth is, you make a perfect

you.

“Pride goes before destruction, and a haughty spirit before a fall” (Proverbs

16:18).

“The pride of your heart has deceived you, you who live in the clefts of the

rock, whose dwelling is on high, who say in your heart, who will bring me down

to the ground? Though you soar aloft like the eagle, though your nest is set

among the stars, from thence I will bring you down, says the Lord” (Obadiah

1:3, 4).

“For by the grace given to me I bid everyone among you not to think of

himself more highly than he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment,

each according to the measure of faith which God has assigned him” (Romans

12:3).

1. How does pride deceive us?

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2. What strains and pressures come to those who decide they must get to the top and

stay there?

3. What does God say about pride?

4. How does pride hurt our relationship with God, our dealings with other people,

and our self-image?

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WEEK NINE

TAKE A HARD LOOK AT

YOURSELF

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Who Tells You What to Do?

Someone once said, “Do what you like and pretty soon you won't like what

you do.” The “let it all hang out” philosophy is likely to get you into a lot of trouble.

Saying exactly what you think will not endear you to your sister, and may incur the

anger of your mother and your teachers, not to mention your principal. Doing

whatever you wish, whenever you wish to do it, may get you acquainted with

policemen, probation officers, and judges.

Since the “real you” seems to be such a monster, you’ve probably allowed

others to dictate your behavior. You congratulate the homecoming queen and say

you're glad she won – even if you think she’s the worst possible choice. You feel

obligated to pretend you like eating pizza and drinking Coke. When people ask how

you are, you answer, “Fine,” even if you're on the verge of tears. The hypocrisy of it

all is frightening, and the thought of being a “carbon copy teen” doesn’t give you

any sense of individuality or importance.

What’s the way out? Only your Creator knows who the “real you” is. If you

give your life to Jesus and determine to obey Him, He’ll bring out your true

personality. If you ask Him to show you the reason you were put on this earth, and

the unique things He wants you to say and do, He’ll show you.

If you buy a new gadget, you ask it how it’s operated. The trial-and-error

methods you might devise would most likely break it. The manufacturer’s

instructions are reliable because the maker of the machine knows just how it will

work best. God put great thought and love into designing you. How about following

His instructions?

“Woe to him who strives with his Maker, an earthen vessel with the potter!

Does the clay say to him who fashions it, ‘What are you making?’ or ‘Your work

has no handles’? Thus says the Lord, the Holy One of Israel, and his Maker:

‘Will you question me about my children, or command me concerning the work

of my hands? I made the earth, and created man upon it; it was my hands that

stretched out the heavens, and I commanded all their host. I have aroused him in

righteousness, and I will make straight all his ways; he shall build my city and set

my exiles free, not for price or reward,’ says the Lord of hosts” (Isaiah 45:9, 11-

13).

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“And now the Lord says, who formed me from the womb to be his servant, to

bring Jacob (the nation of Israel) back to him, and that Israel might be gathered to

him, for I am honored in the eyes of the Lord, and my God has become my

strength” (Isaiah 49:5).

1. List appropriate and inappropriate attitudes we can have toward God and explain

why each attitude is right or wrong.

2. What job did God have for Isaiah? (See Isaiah 49:5).

3. What kinds of attitudes did God have toward Isaiah?

Are You Starring on Broadway or Being Yourself?

Are you being yourself, or are you constantly trying to impress people? For

many people, life is more like acting than living. Putting on a good front is

something taught to us by our society. When some girl talks about all the exciting

places her new boyfriend has taken her, and asks her friend where her dates have

been taking her lately, an honest, “I haven’t been on a date for a year” would be

unthinkable. It’s not easy to admit that you’ve never even heard of the book that

everybody is reading. Not exaggerating about your weekend is equally difficult.

Saying, “I studied for the chemistry test and I failed it” takes a lot of guts.

Besides trying to make people think we’ve done great things, we try to

impress people by what we wear and what we own. Probably most people don’t

enjoy all the time they spend putting on makeup, getting a suntan, or shopping for

clothes, but feel they have to maintain a good image. Worse than this, Christians

often want to appear more “spiritual” than they actually are. A guy once remarked,

“I don’t want to take my new Bible to church. The people will think I never read it.”

Others try to use the right phrase and to go to all the right meetings.

God sees and judges you exactly for what you are. He isn’t impressed with a

holiness act. Any pretense you make in any area of life blocks communication with

God. Besides, acting is hard work. Jesus wants us to be completely honest and for us

to be ourselves. As soon as you stop pretending to be what you are not, the strain

goes away.

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“Beware of practicing your piety (religious duties or practices) before men in

order to be seen by them; for then you will have no reward from your Father who

is in heaven” (Matthew 6:1).

“Thus, when you give alms (money to the poor), sound no trumpet before you,

as the hypocrites do in the synagogues and in the streets, that they may be praised

by men. Truly I say to you, they have received their reward. But when you give

alms, do not let your left hand know what your right hand is doing, so that your

alms may be in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. But

when you pray, go into your room and shut the door and pray to your Father who

is in secret; and your Father who sees in secret will reward you. And in praying

do not heap up empty phrases as the Gentiles do; for they think that they will be

heard for their many words” (Matthew 6:2-4, 6, 7).

1. What problem do we encounter when we want others to see our good deeds?

2. Can you think of any way in which you’ve been trying to be your own “press

agent”? Talk it over with God.

3. How can praying, or witnessing, or giving a testimony be a stage show?

About That Log in Your Eye

If you don’t determine to thank God for the way you look, the abilities you

have, and the things that happen to you, you're certain to get a “log” in your eye that

will keep you from seeing anything clearly. That “log” is jealousy. Jealousy always

comes from lack of trust in God – you don’t trust that God has a reason for you not

dating right now, so you're jealous of the person with a girlfriend or a boyfriend; you

don’t thank God for your hair, so you're jealous of some beautiful blond; you don’t

appreciate the clothes you have, so you're jealous of the doctor’s daughter’s

wardrobe; you aren’t thankful for the talents God has given you, so you're jealous of

the best player on the team.

Every time jealousy raises its ugly head, confess it as sin and determine to be

satisfied with what God has given you, and to thank Him for it. Why don’t you start

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with these two practical suggestions? If you find you are jealous of someone right

now, decide to pray for that person every day for the next month. This will give you

a chance to experience one of God's miracles – a complete attitude change. Second,

make a list of all the things you’ve never thanked God for; then tell God how much

you appreciate Him and the things He has given you. Thanklessness is a sin that

opens the door to jealousy.

“As they were coming home, when David returned from slaying the Philistine,

the women came out of all the cities of Israel, singing and dancing, to meet King

Saul, with timbrels, with songs of joy, and with instruments of music. And the

women sang to one another as they made merry, “Saul has slain his thousands,

and David his ten thousands,’ And Saul was very angry, and this saying

displeased him; he said, ‘They have ascribed to David ten thousands, and to me

they have ascribed thousands, and what more can he have but the kingdom?’ And

Saul eyed David from that day on” (1 Samuel 18:6-9).

“For where jealousy and selfish ambition exist, there will be disorder and

every vile practice” (James 3:16).

1. How should Saul have handled the situation?

2. What did jealousy do to Saul? (Read 1 Samuel 18-31)

3. Why is jealousy so dangerous?

4. If you thank God for the way He made you and trust Him for what happens to

you, why does that cure jealousy?

You're Not Okay, and Neither Am I

The school auditorium is packed with students, parents, relatives, and people

from the neighborhood. The graduates march in. Except for the fact that you lost

your mortarboard on the way in, and your gown is shocking pink while everyone

else’s is navy blue. It is an exciting evening and a great way to end your illustrious

high school career. Then the principal says in a booming voice, “We are pleased to

present ‘The Personality Minus Award’ for this year’s graduating class.”

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He calls out your name and the band plays off-key. You wake up from your

nightmare, wondering if that’s what everyone thinks of you.

Although you should accept yourself as God made you, there are times that

you should not feel good about yourself. You're not okay if you are not dependable –

you can change that. Saying, “Well, I won't worry about my laziness because that’s

just the way I am,” is just like stating, “I can ignore God's Word, and I don’t believe

God has the power to change me.” You don’t just accept the fact that you are always

late – you decide to start being on time.

God has a lot to say about character development, especially in the book of

Proverbs. Every teenager should read Proverbs several times, and follow the advice

offered, allowing the Holy Spirit to show specific steps necessary to reach the goal.

In tenth grade I read a book called How to Improve Your Personality. I remember

thinking, “This book doesn’t say one thing that a person who reads the Bible doesn’t

already know.” Don’t use accepting yourself as an excuse for the attitudes and

actions that God would give you the power to change.

“And we all, with unveiled face, beholding the glory of the Lord, are being

changed into his likeness from one degree of glory to another; for this comes

from the Lord who is the Spirit” (2 Corinthians 3:18).

1. If we put a veil of unbelief, self-centeredness, stubbornness, or something else

over our eyes, we’ll be prevented from really seeing the glory of God and being

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changed by it. Do you read the Bible or come to Jesus in prayer wearing any such

veil?

2. Do the changes come instantly or in degrees?

3. How will we be changed into the likeness of Christ?

4. Where is the power that changes us?

Whom Do You Look Like?

You may be a rugged individualist, determined to be your own person and not

be like anyone else. However, it can't really be done. It’s a fact that most people are

very much like their parents, and often they most resemble the parent they’re

determined not to copy. A husband and a wife often think very much alike. A

teenager reflects the values of the friends he or she has.

In the final analysis there are only two molds: you can either be like Jesus or

like the world. Jesus and the world are opposites, so it’s an either-or proposition.

Being like the world is easy. You absorb the latest trends in the media, such as the

“new” morality, freedom to do your own “thing,” and “Pleasure-at-any-price.”

Behind these is the overriding emphasis of the world – you are the center of the

universe and everything should revolve around you.

The basic premise of the world, that mankind is the focal point of everything,

always has and always will remain the same. However, the expressions of it will

change so fast that in twenty years you'll be the “older” generation. You will have

some choice as to what part of the world to follow, and which people will mold your

thinking, but you will not be “yourself.”

The alternative is to be conformed to the image of Jesus – to not only pattern

yourself after Him but also to allow the living Holy Spirit to produce the attitudes

and actions of Jesus in you. When that happens, you may not be the most popular

person in school – but so what? Being God's friend has eternal rewards!

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“Do not be conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewal your

mind, that you may prove what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable

and perfect” (Romans 12:2).

“Now we have received not the spirit of the world, but the Spirit, which is

from God, that we might understand the gifts bestowed on us by God” (1

Corinthians 2:12).

“Unfaithful creatures! Do you not know that friendship with the world is

enmity with God? Therefore whoever wishes to be a friend of the world makes

himself an enemy of God” (James 4:4).

1. What is the world like and what should be the Christian’s attitude toward it?

2. What are the consequences of being “an enemy of God?

Walking in the Footsteps of Jesus

Do you resemble Jesus? Maybe answering that question with a “yes” seems

impossible to you. Well, the Bible says that God planned long ago that each of us

should be like Jesus. God isn’t like the people who make all kinds of plans and

dreams that they can't possibly fulfill. God has the means and the power to work out

his plans.

The Holy Spirit has put within you the characteristics of Jesus, just as a child

has within him the characteristics of his parents. However, if a two-week-old baby

could leave his or her parents forever, it is extremely doubtful that much more than

the physical resemblances would show up. Most little children spend hours imitating

their parents, and are extremely successful. They spend so much time with their

parents that they are bound to pick up character traits.

The traits of Jesus placed within you by the Holy Spirit at your conversion

will never show through unless you strive to be like Jesus. This means willingness to

deny the thinking of the world in order to follow the teachings of Jesus. It means

spending time – a lot of time – with Jesus. The more time you spend with Him, the

more you will think, act, and talk like Him – the perfect Man.

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“A disciple is not above his teacher, but every one when he is fully taught will

be like his teacher” (Luke 6:40).

“For those whom he foreknew he also predestined to be conformed to the

image of his Son, in order that he might be the firstborn among many brethren”

(Romans 8:29).

“Be imitators of me, as I am of Christ” (1 Corinthians 11:1).

“For to this you have been called, because Christ also suffered for you.

Leaving you an example, that you should follow in his steps” (1 Peter 2:21).

“He who says he abides in him ought to walk in the same way in which he

walked” (1 John 2:6).

1. Would God keep demanding of us something He would not give us the power to

do?

2. Where do we get the power to live as Jesus lived?

3. Is being like Jesus the most important aim in your life, or does that take second

place to other goals?

4. List the analogies that explain to us that we are to be like Jesus.

The Treasure Inside You

With only a dime in your pocket, you can be as careless and haphazard as you

wish. However, if you were carrying a million dollars in cash to deposit in the bank,

your whole attitude would be different. It would be one of great care and soberness

because of the importance of your mission.

Do you fully realize who lives in you? In Solomon’s time God's presence was

in a beautiful temple made of stone, but today, God has made our hearts the place

where He lives! If you have been born again of the Spirit of God, you carry God in

your heart! This should instill in you a sense of awe and respect. You are the temple

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of God. When it dawns on you that you are indeed the house God lives in, you can

do nothing but surrender yourself totally to Him.

Since your heart is Christ’s home, He should have control over every part of

His house. You no longer have the right to think anything you want to; Jesus has a

right to dominate your thoughts. What God's temple looks like on the outside is no

longer determined by your taste and your sense of style; what you wear must be

acceptable to Jesus. God's temple can't be as lazy as it wants to be; God gets to

reform the work habits of His temple.

In addition to moving you to submit totally to God, realizing that you are

God's temple will give you a sense of value because you have a great God inside

you. You don’t have to feel worthless and ugly. Having God live within you is the

greatest privilege in the world.

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you,

which you have from God? You are not your own; you were bought with a price.

So glorify God in your body” (1 Corinthians 6:19, 20).

“So then you are no longer strangers and sojourners, but you are fellow

citizens with the saints and members of the household of God, built upon the

foundation of the apostles and prophets, Christ Jesus himself being the

cornerstone, in whom the whole structure is jointed together and grows into a

holy temple on the Lord; in whom you also are built into it for a dwelling place

of God in the Spirit” (Ephesians 2:19-22).

1. What are the right reasons for you to have a feeling of importance and

“belonging”? What are some wrong reasons?

2. Your body is a “little temple” of God, but it joins with all other Christians to

make the “big temple” of God. Who must direct the way this living temple fits

together and grows?

3. What responsibilities do you have to both the “big temple” and the “little temple”

of God?

4. Which is more important, the inside or the outside of the temple?

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WEEK TEN

GOD DOES LOVE YOU!

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Nobody Loves Me

Have you ever wondered if God really loves you? Or maybe you’ve talked to

someone who has serious doubts about God's love for him. A friend of mine

received a call from a nurse at a local hospital. She was afraid that an eighteen-year-

old patient of hers might die because he had absolutely no desire to live.

A talk with the boy revealed that he had suffered a crippling disease as a child

but had, by constant exercise and work, not only learned to walk again, but to run

and excel in athletics. He was now in the hospital as a result of a terrible automobile

accident that had killed everyone else in his family. He had suffered severe injuries,

but the doctors told him that if he worked hard he had a chance of walking again.

This young man would not believe that God loved him.

My friend took his Bible and read to him the story of the trial and crucifixion

of Jesus. After he finished he asked gently, “Don’t you think the God who sent Jesus

to suffer and die for you really does love you?” The boy agreed.

You may not understand anything that has happened to you, what you are

going through now, or what the future will hold, but the crown of thorns, the spear in

His side, and the nails in His hands forever say, “I love you.”

“Then the soldiers of the governor took Jesus into the praetorium, and they

gathered the whole battalion before him. And they stripped him and put a scarlet

robe upon him, and plaiting a crown of thorns they put it on his head, and put a

reed in his right hand. And kneeling before him they mocked him, saying, ‘Hail,

King of the Jews!’ And they spat upon him, and took the reed and struck him on

the head. And when they had mocked him, they stripped him of the robe, and put

his own clothes on him, and led him away to crucify him” (Matthew 27:27-31).

“In this the love of God was made manifest among us, that God sent his only

Son into the world, so that we might live through him” (1 John 4:9).

1. Study the passage from Matthew 27 and then list all the things Jesus suffered.

2. Why didn’t Jesus stand up for His rights when He was treated unjustly?

3. Would you voluntarily go through such torture for anyone?

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4. Can you think of one reason to doubt that the Jesus who went through all this for

you really loves you?

Forever Love

The Bible speaks often about God's “steadfast love.” Steadfast love is forever

love. It never changes. It is always the same. Your mom might not love you for an

hour after you broke her best dish. Your boyfriend or girlfriend might love you less

after you disappointed him or her. Your employer may not have loved you at all the

day you overslept and left the restaurant short-handed.

But God will always love you. Jesus came to earth to offer visible proof of

God's eternal love. Although Jesus knew that the “rich young ruler” would not give

up his wealth to follow Him, the Bible says, “And Jesus looking upon him loved

him.”

After Peter had denied Jesus three times, the Lord turned and looked at him.

That look of love caused that tough fisherman to run out and cry. Jesus loved the

woman with the bad reputation who put perfume on His feet at a dinner party, and

He made her feel comfortable among the critical guests. Jesus loved Thomas the

doubter and did everything possible to help him believe.

Jesus loves you and will demonstrate His love to you – if you let Him. A

person can accept love only from someone he trusts. You can trust Jesus and depend

on Him for never-ending love.

“The Lord is merciful and gracious, slow to anger and abounding in steadfast

love. He will not always chide, nor will he keep his anger forever. He does not

deal with us according to our sin, nor requite us according to our iniquities. For

as the heaves are high above the earth, so great is His steadfast love toward those

who fear him. … As a father pities his children, so the Lord pities those who fear

him. For he knows our frame; He remembers that we are dust” (Psalm 103:8-11,

13, 14).

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“The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases, His mercies never come to an

end” (Lamentations 3:22).

1. Describe God's love.

2. Can you ever find the top of the sky? Why do you think the height of the sky

(“heavens”) is used in Psalm 103 to explain the extent of God's love for us?

3. Psalm 103:13, 14 are verses to read over and over again on days you can't seem

to do anything right. What comfort do you find in these verses?

But You Can't Hug God!

The guy who tells a girl that he loves her and will do anything for her, and the

girl who responds with the same words, make the theme for a million stories,

movies, and song lyrics. Something within us longs for someone who will give

himself totally for us. Although we know that “and they lived happily ever after” in

he children’s storybooks is a myth, there’s something about a total commitment to

another person that we all want to experience.

The Apostle Paul says that marriage is a symbol of the love between Christ

and the Church. The beautiful thing is that Jesus has given himself totally for you.

He left heaven for you. He was born in a manger for you. He put up with the

Pharisees for you. He allowed Roman soldiers to put nails in His hands for you. He

rose again for you. He is now in heaven praying for you.

Jesus can, and will, do everything for you. The more you think about all that

Jesus has done, the more you'll want to respond to Him with a total surrender of your

life. It isn’t such a tough thing. It’s a natural response to give to someone who has

given everything for you. And even if you can't hug God, you'll discover that the

relationship you can have with Him is deeper than anything you could experience

with another human being.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us

in Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places, even as he chose us

in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless

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before him. He destined us in love to be his sons through Jesus Christ, according

to the purpose of His will, to the praise of his glorious grace which he freely

bestowed on us in the Beloved” (Ephesians 1:3-6).

“In this is love, not that we loved God but that he loved us and sent his Son to

be the expiation (way of making amends for guilt or wrongdoing) for our sins” (1

John 4:10).

1. When did Jesus choose you?

2. Do you find it exciting that God chose you before He made the world?

3. Describe the kind of life God has planned for you.

Love is a Two-Way Street

There cannot be a relationship of love unless both individuals love each other

and give to each other. Jesus gave himself totally to you for a great purpose: that you

might surrender yourself completely to Him and enjoy His companionship.

God has enough love to satisfy you completely – even if no one else really

loves you. Most people are unable to receive all of God's love because they have not

given themselves totally to Him. If you really love someone, pleasing that person is

more important to you than your own desires. Is pleasing Jesus the most important

thing in your life? “True love is very extravagant. It gives without counting the cost.

Are you afraid to give up something for Jesus, or would you give up everything for

Him because of all He means to you?

Several years ago, a man from India lost all he had when he became a

Christian. His wife and children left him and his friends became his enemies. His

comment was, “People always ask me what I gave up to become a Christian, but

nobody asks me what I gained.” He believed that what he had acquired was well

worth the price he paid. That man knew that the more he gave in love to Jesus, the

more of His love he would experience in return.

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Since you're human, you may respond to God's love imperfectly, but if you

daily determine to give yourself totally to God, you will have a beautiful relationship

with Him.

“After these things, God tested Abraham, and said to him, ‘Abraham!’ And he

said, ‘Here am I.’ He said, ‘Take your son, your only son Isaac, whom you love,

and go to the land of Moriah, and offer him there as a burnt offering upon one of

the mountains of which I shall tell you.’’

“And the angel of the Lord called to Abraham a second time from heaven, and

said, ‘By myself I have sworn, says the Lord, because you have done this, and

have not withheld your son, your only son, I will indeed bless you … because

you have obeyed my voice’” (Genesis 22:1-2, 15-18).

“He who has my commandments and keeps them, he it is who loves me; and

he will be loved by my Father, and I will love him and manifest myself to him”

(John 14:21).

1. What was the basis of the wonderful friendship Abraham had with God?

2. Do you have an “Isaac” that must be sacrificed if your relationship to God is to

improve?

3. How do you think Abraham felt after he passed God's test? (Read all of Genesis

22.)

How to Get Enough Water in Your Bucket

Can you imagine a game in which the object is to get your bucket full of water

by begging, borrowing, or stealing from someone else’s half-full pail? Since the

other players also want full buckets, the game doesn’t tend to produce friendships.

Most people are playing such a game, and they are playing for keeps. Worst of

all, the scarce “water” they're fighting for is love. Everyone needs love and tries to

obtain it from other people, but people just don’t have enough to give very

generously. Some people completely give of themselves until they reach a certain

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point, and then call a sudden halt. Others give only when their love is to be returned.

Some have been hurt and they become loners rather than risk more heartbreak.

Others have no love to give and become leeches, trying to get love and attention

wherever they can find it.

Obviously, what’s needed is a never-ending supply of love from an outside

source. God is a never-ending supply of love. In fact, He is love. He loves you now.

He has loved you all your life and will love you forever – no matter what. God can

give you so much love that you can spend your life giving love to others.

“How precious is thy steadfast love, O God! The children of men take refuge

in the shadow of thy wings” (Psalm 36:7).

“By day the Lord commands his steadfast love; and at night His song is with

me, a prayer to the God of my life” (Psalm 42:8).

“Because thy steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise thee” (Psalm

63:3).

“It is good to give thanks to the Lord, to sing praises to thy name, O Most

High; to declare thy steadfast love in the morning and thy faithfulness by night”

(Psalm 92:1, 2).

“We love, because he first loved us” (1 John 4:19).

1. Describe God's character. (Be as specific as possible.)

2. How much time do you spend thinking and talking about love?

3. Think about God's love. Thank Him for being love. Memorize one of the verses.

If God Loves Me, Why Can't I Get My Locker Open?

A three-year-old’s definition of love would be something like this: “If

Mommy really loved me, she’d let me eat all the candy I want.”

An eight-year-old’s definition of love might sound like this: “If our teacher

loved us, she’d let us spend four hours on the play-ground each day.”

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As we grow older our definitions don’t get much better. We feel that if God

really loved us, He’d let us have our own way, give us the possessions we desire,

and keep trouble away from our lives. We forget that since God is love, He is the

One who understands love.

Love is not giving a person whatever he or she wants; God does not love you

by satisfying your every whim and fancy, and you don’t love others that way either.

Genuine love always stays within the boundaries of God's commandments. Real love

is sometimes tough – it’s not always what we want. A God who really loves us will

not fulfill our every desire.

We can enjoy God's love only if we accept the fact that He knows how to run

His universe. If you're a cat lover, you know that some kittens can be lovingly petted

on your lap and their purr will nearly drown out the TV. With the same loving

intentions, you can pick up another cat and it will spit and scratch and bristle. The

difference is only a matter of the cats’ attitudes. In the same way, you can choose to

accept God's love or reject it. Are you a “purr-er” or a “spit-er”?

“Beloved, let us love one another; for love is of God, and he who loves is born

of God and knows God. He who does not love does not know God; for God is

love. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son as the Savior

of the world. In this is love perfected with us, that we may have confidence for

the Day of Judgment, because as He is so are we in this world. There is no fear in

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love, but perfect love casts out fear. For fear has to do with punishment, and he

who fears is not perfected in love” (1 John 4:7, 8, 14, 17, 18).

“Keep yourselves in the love of God; wait for the mercy of our Lord Jesus

Christ unto eternal life” (Jude 21).

1. According to 1 John 4, what are some signs that show God's love is in you?

2. How would you answer this question: “If God loves me, why did He allow my

new bike to be stolen?”

3. Have you ever been angry at God for something? Did God make a mistake or

were you looking at the situation from the wrong point of view?

Nothing Else Matters

Jesus warned that if we love anyone or anything more than we love Him, we

are not worthy of Him. Jesus is to be more important to us than anything else.

One can be so taken up with the beauty of the countryside that looking for

landmarks or remembering the way back becomes irrelevant. Lovers can forget the

time of day and even skip a meal. Have you ever loved Jesus so much that nothing

else mattered or seemed the least bit important? Seeing Jesus like this will take away

your sense of self-sufficiency. You will not dare to depend on yourself to serve God.

The hard times that prove you are nothing in yourself will not throw you, because

you realize that each time you become dependent on God in a given area, you find

the real life God has for you. You will also be willing to do anything God asks –

even something you would normally dislike.

Losing your life for Jesus involves giving unselfishly. I've seen a plaque that

reads, “Cooking, like love, must be entered into with utter abandon or not at all.”

When a person really loves someone, the gift isn’t too expensive, the effort to please

isn’t too great, and the self-sacrifice necessary to do what the other person wants

isn't too big a price to pay. Everyone else might say, “What a waste,” but the person

in love could care less. Do you love Jesus so much that you'll do what He wants

even if everyone thinks it’s ridiculous?

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Wholeheartedly loving Jesus means doing everything for Jesus and not for

other people. If you do good deeds for the poor, help the sick, or comfort the people

who hurt, you'll soon feel that these people are taking advantage of you. However, if

you do it all for Jesus and you love these people because Jesus loves them, it won't

matter, because you're doing it only to please Jesus – and He’s worth any sacrifice.

“He who loves father or mother more than me is not worthy of me; and he

who loves son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me” (Matthew 10:37).

“And he (Jesus) was transfigured before them, and his face shone like the sun,

and his garments became white as light. He was still speaking when lo, a bright

cloud overshadowed them, and a voice from the cloud said, ‘This is my beloved

Son, with whom I am well-pleased; listen to him.’ When the disciples heard this,

they fell on their faces, and were filled with awe. But Jesus came and touched

them, saying, ‘Rise, and have no fear.’ And when they lifted up their eyes, they

saw no one but Jesus only” (Matthew 17:2, 5-8).

1. Why is it logical to give all your love to Jesus?

2. Make a list of “Christian” things you do. Do you do them because you love Jesus,

or for some other reason?

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WEEK ELEVEN

THE RIGHT KIND OF

ROMANCE

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Love is Not That Queezy Feeling in Your Stomach

After watching television or reading romantic novels, one is apt to view love

as some great sensation that suddenly .overwhelms a person – people fall in love

while walking in the moonlight on a warm summer evening, or sitting by a fireplace

after a sleigh ride, but never while cleaning the house or visiting a critically ill

hospital patient. Love is generally viewed as an emotion or chemical reaction that is

either absent or present. When you ask how to recognize this unparalleled

unpredictable emotion, many answer, “Don’t worry, you'll just know.”

Common tests for love go something like this: Do you get butterflies in your

stomach every time you see that “special someone”? Do you think about this person

so much you have trouble studying? Is he or she your “perfect” ideal?

Then a thousand TV commercials a day declare that you must be physically

attractive so that someone will be sure to fall in love with you. It would be a shame

to miss it all because of using the wrong toothpaste!

But, then, people fall out of love for the most amazing reasons. Liz cut her

hair, so Harry doesn’t love her anymore. Jim decided to play baseball three nights a

week, so Jennifer broke up with him. When Sue was asked out by a good-looking

football player, she forgot all about Brian.

These misconceptions our society forces on people locks them into a treadmill

of falling in and out of love, marrying, divorcing, remarrying, and divorcing. People

think that if their heart skips a beat, they’d better marry the person who caused this

great feeling, but as soon as the great emotional feelings leave, they get a divorce.

Don’t fall into that trap. It comes straight from the pit. It is not the kind of love God

wants between a man and a woman.

Because this whole maze of boy-girl relationships can become such a sticky

mess, you desperately need God's guidance in choosing the person to date. He or she

may not even put one butterfly in your stomach – but you can count on God to give

you the very best!

“For the Lord gives wisdom; from his mouth come knowledge and

understanding. Discretion (good judgment) will watch over you; understanding

will guard you” (Proverbs 2:6, 11).

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“Be not wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord, and turn away from evil”

(Proverbs 3:7).

“For the commandment is a lamp and the teaching a light, and the reproofs of

discipline are the way of life, to preserve you from the evil woman, from the

smooth tongue of the adventuress. Do not desire her beauty in your heart, and do

not let her capture you with her eyelashes” (Proverbs 6:23-25).

1. Why is “let your emotions be your guide” dangerous and unscriptural?

2. Why can God do a better job of running your dating life than you can? Are you

willing to let Him control this area of your life?

Thirsty Camels and Prince Charming

The Bible defines love as an act of the will. It commands all people to love

God, followers of Jesus to love their enemies, and husbands to love their wives.

Because real love isn’t based on emotions, a Bible love story is very different from

most novels you’ve read. It starts with obedience to God and prayer.

Abraham obeyed God by determining not to let his son Isaac marry an idol-

worshipper, even though he had to send a servant to a far country to choose a wife

for his son. Imagine the faith involved in this decision! The servant prayed that God

would send the right girl to the well and that she’d offer water for his camels. Sure

enough, Rebekah came and (offered to water his camels. When Rebekah’s father and

brother heard the story they answered: “The thing comes from the Lord; we cannot

speak to you bad or good. Behold, Rebekah is before you, take her and go, and let

her be the wife of your master’s son, as the Lord has spoken” (Genesis 24:50, 51).

When they asked Rebekah if she would go to marry Isaac, she consented. It

was a marriage based on God's will. Maybe that doesn’t sound very romantic, but

after Isaac and Rebekah had been married forty years, we read, “Abimelech, King of

the Philistines looked out of a window and saw Isaac fondling Rebekah his wife.”

Love based solely on emotions changes if the other person does something we

don’t like. Love that is based first on God's will and then on our willingness to love

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that other person – no matter what – is the kind that lasts. That relationship will even

be more romantic in the long run. Your first step toward getting in on the kind of

romance God has in store is letting God decide whom you should or shouldn’t date.

“And Isaac went out to meditate in the field in the evening; and he lifted up

his eyes and looked, and behold, there were camels coming. And Rebekah lifted

up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she alighted from the camel, and said to the

servant, ‘Who is the man yonder, walking in the field to meet us?” The servant

said, ‘It is my master.’ So she took her veil and covered herself. And the servant

told Isaac all the things that he had done. Then Isaac brought her into the tent, and

took Rebekah and she became his wife; and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted

after his mother's death” (Genesis 24:63-67).

1. What problems did Isaac and Rebekah avoid by letting God arrange their

marriage?

2. What problems could you avoid by allowing God to decide whom you should

date?

The True Love Exam

Skiing at top speed down your favorite slope through crisp, sparkling snow,

scoring the winning touchdown in a championship game, and strolling down lovers’

lane on a moonlight night can be enjoyable experiences charged with emotion. Yet,

breaking a leg, dropping the ball, or starting an argument could turn these same

activities into pure misery. Obviously, it’s not very logical to build a lifetime

commitment, such as marriage, on emotions. But because emotions can be very

strong and very real, it’s all too easy to base everything on them.

When you're experiencing that “falling in love feeling,” pray a lot. Ask God to

sort out your emotions. You can choose to follow God no matter how you feel. Keep

in mind that the Bible not only defines love as an act of the will, but also declares

that love can be tested by certain attitudes found in a person. Here is the Bible’s

“true love exam”:

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“Love is patient and kind; love is not jealous or boastful; it is not arrogant or

rude. Love does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does

not rejoice at wrong, but rejoices in the right. Love bears all things, believes all

things, hopes all things, endures all things” (1 Corinthians 13:4-7).

“Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good; love one

another with brotherly affection; outdo one another in showing honor” (Romans

12:9, 10).

In light of the verses you just read, check the statements that are tests of genuine

love.

___ I just have to be with her all the time.

___ I'm so jealous when he pays attention to someone else.

___ I wish he’d hurry up and get around to asking me out.

___ When she is on vacation, I miss her so much I get crabby.

___ He is so understanding and he is the only one who makes me feel good about

myself. I just can't live without him.

___ She’d better not be dating someone else. I wouldn’t stand for it.

___ We love each other so much we’ve decided to move in together.

If you checked even one of the statements, you’d better reread the verses.

Every statement is false. The way God tests true love and the way the world tests

love are very different.

Think of a guy or girl that you are interested in. Take each quality of true love

listed in the above Bible verses and write down how you could show that quality of

love. ( Example: If I really loved him, I’d be patient about his lack of organization

and inability to plan ahead.)

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The Bible Talks About Figs, Not Dates

“He’s not a Christian but he’s the nicest guy I know – a lot nicer than the

Christian guys I know. Besides, you can't tell me what to do because the Bible

doesn’t say anything about dating.” You can't get through life without hearing that a

few times. It is true that dating, as we know it, was nonexistent in Bible times, so the

Bible doesn’t mention it. However, this does not mean that the Bible has nothing to

say on the subject.

What the Bible says about friendships and life attitudes is very applicable to

dating. For example, the Bible states, “But each person is tempted when he is lured

and enticed (attracted) by his own desire” (James 1:14). Dating a non-Christian

automatically initiates some strong desires. You want your relationship to work out.

You want to defend that person before your Christian friends. You also want to

please that person and make him or her happy. Wanting very much something wrong

opens the way for the devil to deceive you. You may want the person to be a

Christian so badly that you convince yourself that he or she is a Christian. It’s easy

to close your eyes to all the faults of that person and refuse to listen to advice. If you

raise an immediate defense every time someone questions your actions, you’d better

talk to God and ask Him to sort out your desires.

Another thing that you do by dating a non-Christian is to encourage a false

interest in the Bible or church, just to please you. The person may also be “faking it”

in other areas, such as drinking and morals. If a person keeps acting a certain way

just to please you, that person will begin to resent you for being his or her

conscience. The only thing left will be for the two of you to break up, or for you to

lower your standards. Giving God the control of your desires will keep you from

hurting yourself and other people.

“Hope deferred (postponed) makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a

tree of life” (Proverbs 13:12).

“A desire fulfilled is sweet to the soul; but to turn away from evil is an

abomination (something hateful and disgusting) to fools” (Proverbs 13:19).

1. Why is dating a non-Christian, with the hope that he or she will change, so

dangerous?

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2. The soul is the part of you that has will, intellect, and emotions. Why do we

enjoy having our desires fulfilled? What is true fulfillment?

3. Read Proverbs 13:19 again. Notice that even if our desires are evil, it is very

hard to turn away from them. The important question is, do you really want what

Jesus wants? Are there desires in your life you must give to Jesus? List them.

I Don’t Need Any Advice

When your father starts out with, “When I was a boy,” or, “”I've lived for a

long time and I know,” it’s easy to snap back, “But I don’t need any advice!” The

truth is, all of us accept advice from someone. The girl who thinks her mother’s

ideas are old-fashioned will constantly ask her girlfriends to help her pick out

clothes; the guy who won't get a haircut to please his parents will do so immediately

if he finds out his girlfriend likes short hair.

From whom will you take advice? When will you refuse to listen? These are

very important decisions. The Bible says about taking advice, “A good wife is the

crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones. The

thoughts of the righteous are just; the counsels (advice) of the wicked are

treacherous” (Proverbs 12:4, 5).

Did you notice that marrying the right person and accepting advice from the

appropriate people are linked in Scripture? There are a couple of important reasons

for this. First, the advice of the person you date or marry is important to you. The

Bible says, “Blessed is the man who walks not in the counsel of the ungodly”

(Psalm 1:1). God cannot bless you if you constantly take advice from a girlfriend or

a boyfriend who is not a believer. This is one of the best reasons for deciding not to

date non-Christians.

On the other hand, a person who is secure in doing the right thing listens to

advice from many people without becoming defensive. The Bible teaches that we are

to obey those in authority over us unless their orders are contrary to God's will. If

you're constantly on the defensive and can't stand any questions from your parents,

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your youth director, or your Christian friends about the person you date, something

is wrong. Unwillingness to take advice from other Christians is very dangerous.

If you don’t have Christian parents, and even if you do, find a mature

Christian to advise you in your dating. Ask that person to pray for you and for your

boyfriend or girlfriend. Godly advice is a valuable aid to right living.

“Where there is no guidance, a people falls; but in an abundance of counselors

there is safety” (Proverbs 11:14).

“By insolence (pride, disrespect for authority) the heedless make strife, but

with those who take advice is wisdom” (Proverbs 13:10).

“Do not be deceived: ‘Bad company ruins good morals’” (1 Corinthians

15:33).

1. Whose advice should you follow and whose advice should you discard?

2. What are the advantages of taking godly advice?

3. Whose advice have you been refusing that you should begin accepting?

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Your Responsibility in Dating

The responsibility you have toward the person you date is the same

responsibility you have toward all Christians. However, it is intensified because your

relationship is so close and the opinion of the other person is so important to you.

Your first responsibility is to help the other person be the very best Christian he or

she can be. This obviously includes helping that person keep the highest moral

standards. This requires some advance thinking, so when you plan a date, consider

these kinds of questions: Would seeing this movie bring us closer to Christ? Would

sitting around talking for a long time in the moonlight invite unnecessary

temptation? Would wearing this outfit make it harder for my date to keep his

thoughts pure?

Because you are Christians, your purpose in life – and on every date – is to

glorify God. It is your responsibility to pray for the person you date and to

encourage that person in Bible study. Be willing to give up time spent with each

other so each of you can serve Christ – maybe there is a boy or girl who isn’t dating

who needs some of your time. Encourage the person you date to put love for Jesus

above love for you. A big Scripture memorization project could be dynamite for

both of you.

An important responsibility you have toward those of the opposite sex is

giving them a healthy self-image. If one girl tells another she has a lousy figure, the

remark, although inexcusable, can be forgotten. But if a guy says, “Well if the fat,

flat look were in, you'd be a star in Hollywood.” that girl will remember it until she

is ninety.

If a girl tells a guy, “You are the clumsiest thing on two feet,” that will help

ruin his self-image. Flattery is wrong, but carefully worded encouragement can be

invaluable in building up another Christian. Dating is a good place to practice

showing consideration, kindness, and acceptance.

“How can a young man keep his way pure? By guarding it according to thy

Word. With my whole heart I seek thee; let me not wander from thy

commandments! I have laid up thy Word in my heart, that I might not sin against

thee. Blessed be thou, O Lord; teach me thy statutes” (Psalm 119:9-12).

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“Let us then pursue what makes for peace and for mutual up-building”

(Romans 14:19).

1. How can you live up to the high standard of purity that God has for you?

2. After reading this passage, what place do you think studying and memorizing

God's Word should have in a Christian dating relationship?

3. According to Romans 14:19, what should be your goal in a dating relationship?

If you're presently in a dating relationship, are you seeking to fulfill that goal?

I’d Rather Lie Than Hurt His Feelings

After your dating relationship is ended, the person you dated will either be

closer to Christ or farther away because of you. Consider that. You must be careful

not to hurt the other person unnecessarily; judge your actions according to the effect

they will have on him or her. Don’t just consider what you mean but also what the

other person thinks you mean. A popular girl has no right to flirt with a shy guy just

because she needs a New Year’s Eve date, and then suddenly become “busy” for the

next five months. The “goddess” who leaves a string of broken hearts behind her

certainly isn’t heeding Jesus’ command to “love one another.”

Guys, realize that girls are dreamers who make mental memory books out of

all your words and actions. Don’t say, “I love you” unless you really mean it – she

may start planning the wedding! Girls sometimes interpret an outward display of

affection more deeply than was intended, so fellows need to be careful. It isn’t fair to

set another person up for a big letdown.

Covering up true feelings by pretending that you are going to date the person

indefinitely, and then dropping him or her like a hot potato, has no place in Christian

dating. If you habitually pray together, you'll find it easier to be honest and open

with each other. Besides, you need God's help. Books on marriage seem to agree that

lack of communication is the number one problem in marriage. If you think being

honest would ruin your relationship, it should be ruined, because it has no future.

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“Put false ways far from me; and graciously teach me thy law” (Psalm

119:29)!

“Let love be genuine; hate what is evil, hold fast to what is good” (Romans

12:9).

“Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him

who is the head, into Christ” (Ephesians 4:15).

1. List some ways you could lie or create a false impression on a date.

2. In what situations is it difficult to be honest in dating?

3. Is a “but I might hurt her feelings” a good enough reason to disobey God's Word?

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WEEK TWELVE

IT’S NOT EASY TO LOVE

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Broken, Bleeding Hearts and Puppy Love

“You'll get over it.”

“Well, they say that puppy love is real to the puppy, but you're too young to

take it so seriously.”

“There are other fish in the sea.”

When breaking up was not your idea, and you're really hurt, none of these

comments is very comforting. Although we usually associate “heartbreak” with

romance, your parents’ divorce, your unfulfilled dream, or moving in the middle of

your senior year may be just as painful. But, there is something you can do with your

broken heart. You can bring it to Jesus and He can heal it: “He heals the

brokenhearted, and binds up their wounds” (Psalm 147:3).

First, confess any bitterness or resentment you feel. Bitterness and resentment

are sin, and are like dirt that keeps a wound from healing unless totally cleaned out.

A broken heart is bad enough. You don’t need to get it full of infection.

Second, you must want Jesus to heal you. This may sound strange at first, but

we really do enjoy self-pity. I once heard a girl admit, “Every time I talk about Bill

breaking up with me, I cry, but I just love to talk about it.” We all know people who

fill any listening ear with all the sad tales of their lives.

Indulging in self-pity is also wrong and must be confessed. No matter how

unfair the situation, no matter how much you are wronged, and no matter how

deceitful the other person was, you must reject self-pity and treat it as sin.

Finally, Jesus can't heal your broken heart if you’ve decided that stone hearts

don’t hurt when they get broken – you'll just be tough and let your heart harden.

Although there is always room in the “Who-Needs-Women-Anyway Gang,” observe

how this kind of person turns out. Because he is afraid to love and afraid to give, he

keeps his distance from people. God doesn’t want you to become that kind of

person.

You cannot heal your own broken heart. Healing a broken heart takes a miracle –

and only Jesus can do it. Be honest with Him. Tell Him the whole thing. But don’t

stop there. In faith, ask Him to heal your broken heart and expect Him to act. Hearts

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don’t always heal instantly, so keep trusting Him, even if the hurt is still there after

you’ve prayed. Let Jesus use the experience to draw you closer to Him.

“For he grew up before him like a young plant, and like a root out of dry

ground; he had no form or comeliness that we should look at him, and no beauty

that we should desire him. He was despised and rejected by men; a man of

sorrows and acquainted with grief; and as one from whom men hide their faces

he was despised, and we esteemed him not. Surely he has borne our griefs and

carried our sorrows; yet we esteemed him stricken, smitten by God, and afflicted.

But he was wounded for our transgressions, he was bruised for our iniquities;

upon him was the chastisement that made us whole, and with his stripes we are

healed” (Isaiah 53:2-5).

1. Why is Jesus qualified to understand your heartache?

2. Do you think that Jesus’ dying on the cross to make us whole and to heal us

includes emotional healing? Why?

Jesus, the Heart Healer

You may feel like a Humpty Dumpty – not only all the king’s horses and all

the king’s men, but the whole U.S. Army and all of medical science can't put you

back together again. Your heart is broken into so many pieces that it’s not even

recognizable. The girl who is depressed because her boyfriend broke up with her

might seem like “kid stuff” to you. Maybe you’ve used sex in the wrong way,

resulting in shattering heartbreak. Maybe your home is in constant turmoil and you

feel as if no one has ever cared about you. You are part of a vicious circle that goes

like this: no one has really loved you, so you are afraid to or don’t know how to love

anyone else; therefore, no one finds you easy to love.

God's love and forgiveness offers a way out. God will forgive you and make

you a new person – no matter what you’ve done. Receive his forgiveness and then

receive His healing for your broken heart. As you give each hurt to Him, ask Jesus to

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heal your heartaches. Jesus can take you out of the vicious circle and put you into

the winner’s circle where you can receive love from God and give it to other people.

“I bless the Lord who gives me counsel; in the night also my heart instructs

me. I keep the Lord always before me; because he is at my right hand, I shall not

be moved. Thou dost show me the path of life; in thy presence there is fullness of

joy, in thy right hand are pleasures for evermore” (Psalm 16:7, 8, 11).

“The Spirit of the Lord God is upon me, because the Lord has anointed me to

bring good tidings to the afflicted; he has sent me to bind up the brokenhearted,

to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are

bound” (Isaiah 61:1).

1. Reread Psalm 16: 11. Where can you always find real joy in spite of what has

happened to you?

2. Did Jesus heal the blind who didn’t ask for help? Why not? Do you think Jesus

will heal the broken hearts of people who decide to suffer through on their own

or just don’t bother to ask Jesus specifically for His help? Why not?

But, Everybody’s Doing It!

“The only people I know of who think that sex before marriage is wrong are

Queen Victoria and my grandmother.” You may have heard statements like that.

There’s a virtual epidemic of people living together before marriage. Because the

couples living together include everyone from your girlfriend’s mother and her

boyfriend to kids who grew up in your church, you may wonder if it can really be so

bad.

When it comes to moral standards, whether or not others are doing it is

completely irrelevant. The point is, what does God think about it? Older people in

our country are accustomed to a society in which a majority of people supported

Christian moral standards. When they were young the Christians didn’t have to be

“different” to have high morals. All that has changed. If you follow God's moral

standards now, you are in the minority.

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Although God has very important psychological and physical reasons for

prohibiting sex outside of marriage, the proponents of sex before marriage can make

their arguments sound very good. In this area of life as in every other, we obey what

God says, because our Creator is smarter than we are, He loves us, and He knows

what is best for us. What other people are doing and what may seem logical must be

disregarded if it is contrary to the Bible.

If you have been involved in immorality, God offers complete forgiveness and

a new life. However, there is no room in the life of a Christian for justifying sex

before marriage.

“The body is not meant for immorality, but for the Lord, and the Lord for the

body. Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I therefore

take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Never! Do

you not know that he who joins himself to a prostitute becomes one body with

her? For, as it is written, ‘The two shall become one flesh.’ But he who is united

to the Lord becomes one spirit with him. Shun immorality. Every other sin that a

man commits is outside the body; but the immoral man sins against his own

body” (1 Corinthians 6:13 b, 15-18).

“For this is the will of God, your sanctification (state of being completely set

apart for God, dedicated to God, holy): that you abstain from unchastity; that

each one of you know how to take a wife for himself in holiness and honor” (1

Thessalonians 4:3, 4).

1. Why is premarital sex wrong? List the reasons.

2. Why is the sex act meant to begin a permanent union?

3. What is God's intended purpose for our bodies?

God Lays It on the Line

If you’ve ever made a dress, decorated a cake, rebuilt an engine, or painted a

picture, you took extremely good care of your “creation.” God made you, and His

rulers about sex are designed to take the very best care of you. He created sex and

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He wants you to get the most out of it. He knows that within marriage you will

receive the maximum enjoyment from sex. This does mean, of course, that you will

have to give up momentary pleasure now for the more lasting satisfaction then. If

you are given a choice between a hamburger at McDonalds now, and a steak dinner

at the best restaurant in town three hours from now, you will of course, deny your

stomach instant food in order to enjoy the steak. The steak dinner will taste all the

better because you didn’t have the hamburger.

God's rule is, “You shall not commit adultery” (Exodus 20:14). Someone has

observed that God gave Ten Commandments, not ten suggestions! His laws are

based on the fact that people have willpower and are responsible for their actions. He

doesn’t talk in terms of “accidents” or people who “just can't help themselves”. If

you have a good enough reason for not doing something, you'll refrain from it. If

you knew that each action of yours would be televised on the major networks, you'd

find it very possible to exercise a lot of self-control.

But you’ve got an even better reason for doing right: disobeying God has

harsh consequences. God's rules are safeguards for us. Instead of looking on

God's commandments as unwelcome restrictions, learn to say like the Psalmist,

“Thy testimonies are my delight. They are my counselors” (Psalm 119:24).

“But because of the temptation to immorality, each man should have his own

wife and each woman her own husband” (1 Corinthians 7:2).

“Treat younger men like brothers, and older women like mothers, younger

women like sisters, in all purity” (1 Timothy 5:1 b, 2).

“Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be

undefiled; for God will judge the immoral and adulterous” (Hebrews 13:4).

1. How was young Timothy to treat the young women of the church?

2. Do you regard Christian young people of the opposite sex as brothers or sisters in

Christ?

3. What is God's view of the position of marriage?

4. What does the Bible say about sex outside of marriage?

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Are You Running a Reform School?

I was listening to “Unshackled,” a Christian radio drama. The story was one

of many that began with, “I married a beautiful Christian girl and she was

determined to reform me, but it just didn’t work out.” That day I gained new insight

on the issue of trying to use one’s influence to reform another person.

I’d recently talked with a high school girl who was convinced she couldn’t

stop dating her non-Christian boyfriend because he “needed” her good influence.

She had argued, “If I drop him, who will lead him to Christ?”

Although I knew from experience that trying to reform another person by

charm and influence was hopeless, I had never thought of it as being clearly wrong.

Through that program, I saw it. Since only Jesus can redeem a soul, only Jesus can

reform a life, and only He can meet every human need. When trying to help a person

spiritually, any time we make that person dependent on ourselves instead of

depending on God, we are doing something terribly wrong.

The reason that it’s so easy to fall for Satan’s lie at this point, is that our “need

to be needed” is so great. This is God's answer: In Jesus we can find everything we

need so we won't need a certain person around to make us feel secure. Also, we are

wanted and loved by Jesus. The poem that begins, “He has no hands but our hands to

do His work today” is true. God could have been self-sufficient, but He designed the

world so that He would need us to cooperate with Him in doing His work. That

should make you feel needed!

Also realize that if Jesus can supply our every need, He can do the same for

everyone else. You can drop your non-Christian friend and God will take better care

of him than you ever could. God loves that person much more than you do. You

don’t have to date that good-looking non-Christian girl “just to help her,” because if

you really wanted to help her, you'd pray for her! There’s no room for the kind of

pride that says, “I can do something that God cannot do.” All of us sooner or later

need to realize that God is the only one who can change people from the inside out.

Then we will stop trying to reform people ourselves and start praying that God will

work in their lives.

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“The king’s heart is a steam of water in the hand of the Lord; He turns it

wherever he will” (Proverbs 21:1).

“O house of Israel, can I not do with you as this potter has done? says the

Lord. Behold, like the clay in the potter’s hand, so are you in my hand, O house

of Israel” (Jeremiah 18:6).

1. Why isn’t it your responsibility to reform anybody?

2. Are there some people you should stop trying to change and instead be praying

for?

Love Someone You Hate

“I just can't stand that woman.”

“That guy gives me the creeps.”

“He’d do the human race a favor by evaporating!”

Have you ever said or thought things like that? People show great lack of love

toward others for a thousand reasons: they use the wrong deodorant, they sing off-

key, they talk too much, or they slurp their soup. Sometimes we try to sound “good”

by saying, “I love her, but I don’t like her,” or, “I usually love her, but I don’t

today,” or, “I’d love him if he’d change.”

Jesus, however, commands us to love one another unconditionally – “This is

my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you” (John 15:12).

Jesus loved each of us enough to die for us while we were still sinners, deserving

nothing from Him. If I honestly hate Sue, and God says I should love her, I can't just

say I love her; that would make me a hypocrite. However, I can love by faith. I can

obey God's Word literally, knowing that if Jesus commanded me to love everyone,

He’ll give me the power to do it. I must act on that belief and love that person by

faith. If I've ever done anything wrong to Sue, I apologize and make it right – even if

Sue has done ten times as many bad things to me – and I don’t word my apology in

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such a way as to expect one in return. I simply say, “Sue, I borrowed your blouse

without asking you and I'm sorry. It’s washed and clean now. Will you forgive me?”

I can also do nice things for Sue, such as buy her flowers, help her with

homework, and invite her to go with my friends and me to the basketball game. I

don’t do it by gritting my teeth and whispering under my breath, “I'm going to love

Sue if it kills me,” but rather, I pray, “Jesus, what I'm doing for Sue, I'm doing for

you, and I'm asking you for the love I don’t have.” If you obey God's command to

show love, sooner or later the right emotions will come tagging along behind.

“If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners

love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what

credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. … But love your enemies, and

do good, and lend, expecting nothing in return; and your reward will be great,

and you will be sons of the Most High; for he is kind to the ungrateful and the

selfish. Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful” (Luke 6:32, 33, 35, 36).

1. Why don’t we get “points” for loving people who are nice to us?

2. What reason is given for the command to love our enemies?

3. List some of the unkind and selfish people God expects you to love.

4. What’s the difference between trying to love people on your own and loving

them with God's love?

Love Can Melt Enemies

Maybe it’s the kid at school who constantly calls you names, shoots rubber

bands at you, and spreads false rumors about you; or maybe it’s the person who was

terribly unkind and unfair to your mother; or maybe it’s the teacher who constantly

scoffs at “Bible-believing fanatics”; or it could even be another Christian that you

have trouble getting along with – somebody is bound to give you the opportunity to

demonstrate God's dynamite weapon against enemies. Prayer!

God commands us to pray for our enemies. If you sincerely and constantly

pray for your enemies, some exciting things will happen. For instance, you can't hate

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and pray at the same time. If you continue to pray, God will miraculously give you

love for those who have wronged you. Also, God will work in their lives, and they

will begin to notice that in spite of what they’ve done, you love them. Now, the

other person will not necessarily stop hating you. In fact, he may feel so guilty that

he’ll treat you even worse. But God will use your actions to advertise Christianity.

If Christians don’t love their enemies, they are no different from the world.

God has made “love your enemies” love available to all of us. Maybe you’d better

start by making a “Those Who Don’t Like Me Very Much Prayer List,” and pray for

those people every day.

“You have heard it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your

enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray

for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in

heaven; for He makes His sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on

the just and on the unjust. For if you love those who love you, what reward have

you? Do not even the tax collectors do the same? And if you salute only your

brethren, what more are you doing than others? Do not even the Gentiles do the

same? You, therefore, must be perfect, as your heavenly Father is perfect”

(Matthew 5:43-48).

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“Repay no one evil for evil, but take thought for what is noble in the sight of

all. If possible, so far as it depends on you, live peaceably with all” (Romans

12:17, 18).

1. What are we to do for those who persecute us?

2. Is it always possible to make our enemies love us even if we love them?

3. How does God treat the people who reject Him?

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WEEK THIRTEEN

THAT MOUTH OF YOURS

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Does Your Tongue Need a Prison Sentence?

“Why did I say that?”

Who hasn’t despairingly made that remark? All of us need discretion – the

ability to say the right thing at the right time.

Living the Christian life is like operating in enemy territory – sin is

everywhere and we must be on the lookout. We could make good use of armed

soldiers to keep us from saying the wrong thing; and even the Psalmist said, “Set a

guard over my mouth, O Lord.”

And it isn’t true that as long as a Christian speaks the truth, he can say

anything he wishes. The person who is discreet relies on God for every word. This

shouldn’t be a self-conscious fear of opening your mouth, but the confidence a child

has that he won't get lost as long as he holds his mother's hand. It’s the child that

goes off by himself who gets into trouble, and it’s the Christian who thinks he can

run his own show who falls.

There is an old saying, “What exists in the well of the thoughts will soon

come up in the bucket of speech.” Guarding your speech starts with guarding your

heart. Jealousy against another person can quickly cause an unkind word. Trying to

protect your selfish interests can cause you to lash out at someone else.

Unwillingness to see your own faults can make you defensive.

Discretion has its root in self-knowledge. We know what we’re like: we’re

sinful and we must depend on God. Any pride or cockiness on our part means we

don’t know what’s in the human heart. Jeremiah asks about the human heart, “Who

can know it?” The answer, of course, is that only God knows, and He says it’s sinful.

Because we are sinful, we can't trust our own discretion, but we can exercise faith

and God will give us true discretion. We best learn discretion by being silent, rather

than by talking all the time. That doesn’t mean you should put your tongue in jail

and be afraid to say anything. Discretion balks at rashness but is quick to encourage

and speak positively.

“Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord, keep watch over the door of my lips”

(Psalm 141:3).

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“When words are many, transgression is not lacking, but he who restrains his

lips is prudent (sensible)” (Proverbs 10:19).

“There is one whose rash (reckless) words are like sword thrusts, but the

tongue of the wise brings healing” (Proverbs 12:18).

“Be not rash with your mouth, nor let your heart be hasty to utter a word

before God, for God is in heaven, and you upon earth; therefore let your words be

few” (Ecclesiastes 5:2)

1. What are the problems of talking too much?

2. How can realizing how great God is and how small you are (Ecclesiastes 5:2)

help you not to say and do rash things?

3. Have you asked God to set a guard over your lips?

Please Erase the Remark I Just Made

There’s an old story about a woman who came to see her pastor. She said,

“I've been guilty of spreading false rumors and now I want to undo all the damage.”

The pastor told her to come with him. He bought some goose feathers and

they climbed to the top of the church’s bell tower. The pastor then asked the lady to

drop the goose feathers. The wind quickly scattered them. “Now,” the pastor

ordered, “go down and gather the feathers.”

“But, Pastor,” protested the woman, “that would be impossible.”

“I know,” he replied; “just as impossible as taking back all the words you’ve

spoken.”

Words don’t just disappear. You have an inner “replay button” that keeps

playing back certain words someone has said to you. Maybe it’s your exasperated

father roaring, “If you don’t like it here, leave – and don’t bother to come back!” or a

teacher, at their wit’s end, exploding, “You're hopeless. You'll never learn algebra!”

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Words like these sometimes affect us for a long time – even if the person who

said them didn’t really mean them. Talking is one of the most dangerous things any

of us can do. Words can't be erased or obliterated, so you must think how your

words will affect the other person before you say them.

People who recognize that they don’t have the right to say whatever they want

can get help from Jesus just by asking for it.

“I tell you, on the Day of Judgment men will render account for every careless

word they utter” (Matthew 12:36).

“But no human being can tame the tongue – a restless evil, full of deadly

poison. With it we bless the Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who are

made in the likeness of God. From the same mouth come blessing and cursing.

My brethren, this ought not to be so” (James 3:8-10).

1. Who can tame the tongue?

2. What things shouldn't our tongues be sued for?

3. List some specific ways in which you could be more careful about the things you

say.

Your Mouth Needs a Lie Detector

A little boy once described a lie as “a terrible sin, but a very present help in

time of trouble.” One of the constant temptations faced by all Christians is the

temptation to lie. It can be done in so many ways. “Well, it wasn’t my fault,” or,

“What are you talking about?” slip out before we even think.

The truth, however, would sound like this: “We were playing catch too close

to the window and I missed the ball”; or, “I did throw that paper airplane out the

window – in fact, it was a new design”; or, “Yes, I did cheat on the test.” Do you lie

when you want to avoid punishment?

Then there’s exaggeration – “All the other kids (all six of them) are going on

the camping trip, and I'm the only one (along with four others) whose parents won't

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let me go”; or, “I simply must have a new dress because my old one is ragged and

faded and has ink spots, glue splotches, and gum on it.”

Then there are lies to make us look just a little better: “I knew the answer but I

just didn’t say it”; “I thought the program started at 8:00 so I that’s why I'm late”; or,

“Didn’t you say the theme was due on Monday instead of Friday?”

We tend to think that everybody stretches the truth a little, so it’s no big deal.

God thinks that lying is so bad that He included it in the Ten Commandments. You

must not excuse yourself for lying, but God will forgive you if you agree with Him

that lying is a sin and confess it.

Take Jesus with you through every day as your own personal Lie Detector. He

will teach you how to tell the truth in every situation.

“Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment”

(Proverbs 12:19).

“Lying lips are an abomination (something hateful) to the Lord, but those who

act faithfully are his delight” (Proverbs 12:22).

“A righteous man hates falsehood, but a wicked man acts shamefully and

disgracefully” (Proverbs 13:5).

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“A false witness will not go unpunished, and he who utters lies will not

escape” (Proverbs 19:5).

1. How does God feel about lying?

2. What will happen to liars?

3. Do you tolerate lying and do you consider “stretching” the truth as normal?

You Mean Complaining Is a Sin?

Some parts of the Old Testament are rather difficult to understand, and as you

read them you think that there’s nothing there that applies to you. Yet, people who

keep on reading the Old Testament find many verses that almost jump off the pages

and tell them how to live. One such verse is Numbers 11:1: “And the people

complained in the hearing of the Lord about their misfortunes; and when the Lord

heard it, his anger was kindled.”

God hates complaining! In fact, He sent a terrible fire to burn some of the

tents of the Israelites as punishment for their complaints. Another time, He sent

poisonous snakes. He had parted the Red Sea so they could safely escape slavery,

and had drowned Pharaoh’s army in the same sea. He was giving them bread from

heaven to eat every day. Yet, they complained.

But, look what God has done for us. He has saved us from sin and given us

the Bible. We have Christian friends who care about us, as well as families, so much

food that most of us must watch our weight, and so many clothes that we can't

decide what to wear.

American adults complain about high taxes, the cost of living, presidents they

disagree with, and the weather. Teenagers complain about the food in the

lunchroom, parents who don’t understand them, mean teachers, and the price of

pizza.

I'll bet even you spend some time every day complaining! But complaining is

sin, and God hates it. This is hard to face because most of us would have to admit,

“If complaining is a sin, I'm a terrible sinner.” Complaining is wrong and we must

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stop it. Complaining is lack of trust in God and a slap in our Heavenly Father’s face

who has done so much for us.

Complaining ruins your personality. Everyone tries to avoid a chronic

complainer. Ask God to help you hate complaining and to treat complaining as sin, a

terrible offense against God – and not as your right to vent your feelings.

“We must not put the Lord to the test, as some of them did and were destroyed

by serpents; nor grumble as some of them did and were destroyed by the

Destroyer” (1 Corinthians 10:9, 10).

“Do all things without grumbling or questioning, that you may be blameless

and innocent, children of God without blemish in the midst of a crooked and

perverse generation among whom you shine as lights in the world” (Philippians

2:14, 15).

1. What things are we warned against in these verses?

2. Pray about it and then list the specific things God would have you stop

complaining about.

Snakes, Quails, and Grumblers

What we think affects us, but once we verbalize something, it becomes part of

us in a much deeper way. People can say things so often that they end up believing

them.

When I was in second grade, a boy at school started the day by saying, “I wish

I could have a birthday party.” By morning recess he was saying, “I'm having a

birthday party,” and by noon he had invited a whole group of classmates to the

nonexistent party. We ran home to tell our mothers that we had been invited to a

party. The boy’s mother was furious.

We think we are a lot smarter than that second grade boy – but we aren’t. The

grownup Israelites in the wilderness talked so much about the “good old days” in

Egypt that they forgot how cruel slavery in Egypt had been. Soon they were mad at

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Moses for bringing them into the terrible wilderness. It took snakebites to bring them

to their senses.

Another time some Israelites started complaining that they didn’t have meat to

eat, and kept saying that eating manna every day was “the pits”. Soon they all

believed they were deprived, forsaken, and protein-starved. (They forgot that the

Creator of the universe might also be a nutrition expert.) God then sent them so

many quails that the greedy people got sick from eating too much.

If you keep saying something, pretty soon you'll believe it and act upon it.

That means you'd better be careful what you say. Also because saying and believing

the wrong thing is so serious, God must sometimes take drastic measures to keep

you on track. Next time you're just about to say, “All the people at that church are

hypocrites,” or, “My parents don’t care what I do,” let visions of snakes or quails

keep you from disobeying God!”

“Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in

thy sight, O Lord, my rock and my redeemer” (Psalm 19:14).

“An evil man is ensnared by the transgression of his lips, but the righteous

escapes from trouble” (Proverbs 12:13).

“Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may

know how you ought to answer every one” (Colossians 4:6).

“Now may our Lord Jesus Christ himself, and God our Father, who loved us

and gave us eternal comfort and good hope through grace, comfort your hearts

and establish them in every good work and word” (2 Thessalonians 2:16, 17).

1. What are the results of saying wrong things? What happens when we say the

right things?

2. God can take measures to deal with us if we speak wrongly. What will He do if

we speak good things?

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Did You Know That Your Mind Is on Parade?

You know the type. They have names for their teachers, such as “Skinny

Neck,” “Gestapo George,” and “Crazy Carlson”. They make nasty comments about

the boy whose hair was cut too short and about the girl with the bad complexion.

They constantly brag about themselves and put other people down. Their

conversations are sprinkled with “I don’t care what anyone says,” and “Nobody is

going to tell me what to do.”

Such people get into arguments or fights if anyone says anything even mildly

offensive to them. Listening is an activity they avoid because it would deprive them

of the opportunity of loudly proclaiming what they think. When a person in authority

tries to correct them, to give advice, or to ask them to follow rules laid down for

everyone, they interrupt with smart remarks.

The Bible calls people like these “fools” and “scoffers” – and says some very

harsh things about them. By their words they show that they are unwilling to change,

or to accept correction.

How much of that description of the scoffer fits you? Someone has said,

“Every time you open your mouth, your mind goes on parade.” Start improving the

parade by letting God deal with attitudes toward your peers, your authorities, and

yourself.

“He who corrects a scoffer gets himself abuse, and he who reproves a wicked

man incurs injury. Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you; reprove a wise

man, and he will love you. Give instruction to a wise man, and he will be still

wiser; teach a righteous man, and he will increase in learning. The fear of the

Lord is the beginning of wisdom, and the knowledge of the Holy One is insight”

(Proverbs 9:7-10).

1. What kinds of things does your speech reveal about your character?

2. How good are you at accepting correction and taking advice?

3. Where does true wisdom come from?

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Oh, What a Beautiful Tongue You Have!

People often comment on beautiful eyes, flawless complexion, and lovely

smiles, but no one ever says, “Oh, what a beautiful tongue you have!” Yet, that

would be the nicest compliment you could ever receive – what you say can do so

much good. Words of encouragement can help someone through an especially hard

day. Telling your mother you love her could brighten her whole month, and saying

thank you to a teacher might make him think it’s been worth the effort.

Your tongue can say something cheerful when everyone else is complaining

and it can say something nice about the person everyone else is putting down. The

cruel things people say make living in this world extremely difficult. Your tongue

can make a big difference in the atmosphere and make life easier for a lot of people.

Your tongue can also introduce people to Jesus and tell others that God loves

them. Your tongue, more than any other part of your body, can make you a person

worth knowing – one who brings comfort and cheerfulness wherever he goes. Stop

concentrating solely on getting the world’s best tan and getting your hair to go just

right; start praying that God will teach you to say the right things. That’s the first

step toward having a beautiful tongue.

“The tongue of the wise dispenses knowledge, but the mouths of fools pour

out folly” (Proverbs 15:2).

“To make an apt answer is a joy to a man, and a word in season, how good it

is” (Proverbs 15:23).

“A word fitly spoken is like apples of gold in a setting of silver” (Proverbs

25:11).

“The Lord God has given me the tongue of those who are taught, that I may

know how to sustain with a word him that is weary. Morning by morning he

wakens, he wakens my ear to hear as those who are taught” (Isaiah 50:4).

1. Do you speak before thinking, or do you carefully decide what to say?

2. When was the last time you gave encouragement to someone who needed it?

3. How do we learn to say the things that would really help people? (See

Isaiah 50:4).

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